TRANSCRIPT: Sexual Shadow Work Is the ONLY Shadow Work You Need
“Shadow work” is a hot topic these days.
Everyone is doing their “shadow work”.
I’ve been calling this process “demon hunting” for decades.
For anyone who doesn’t know, the idea of the “shadow’ comes from the work of Swiss psychiatrist, Carl Jung.
He spoke of the shadow as the seat of the repressed parts of the self.
The parts we try to deny and keep hidden.
The more we do that, the more likely they are to spring out and ambush us at the most inopportune moments.
So the idea of shadow work, or “demon hunting” is that we go looking for them.
And in Anami Land, we invite them out to play.
We recognize that by integrating these disparate and dissociated parts of ourselves, we become stronger, richer, and more impervious.
Because, once you know your weaknesses—and alchemize them—you aren’t weak anymore.
All the things that haunt you, you step right up, look them in the eye and dare them to take their best shot.
You invite your demons—which are not external beings, they are the internal parts of your self you have not claimed, the wounds that have not healed—you invite them out for tea or into the boxing ring and you work that shit out.
The reason I say that sexual shadow work is THE most powerful shadow work—and I’d assert the only shadow work anyone really needs is because
There is SO MUCH taboo, repression, misinformation about all things sexual.
And it runs SO deep.
Everyone has some level of sexual trauma.
Whether it’s outright physical violation, genital mutilation or absorbing all of the negative beliefs projected upon us.
Everybody’s got something.
Since our sexual energy is the core of who we are, when that gets suppressed, EVERYTHING In our life gets suppressed.
And conversely, when it gets healed, everything in our life gets healed —maybe not everything, permanently forever—but definitely transformed and positively impacted.
Our sexual power, which is literally the pro-creative power of the universe is the source.
Once you open that flow and tap into that energy, you now have the pro-creative life-force energy power of the universe at your fingertips and under your conscious control.
Once you go through these caves and fires of your sexual self, everything else in your life will be illuminated.
If you go deep here, it’s the panacea for all.
Over the years, I’ve watched as people have issues like weight gain, financial problems, feeling stuck in their jobs and not working in a “vocation” or their dharma.
Instead of doing “career counselling” and extra “nutritional coaching” — I tell them to go fuck themselves.
And their partners.
Thoroughly. Artfully. and Heartfully.
Anami, gourmet-sex style.
The pounds come off, their dream careers materialize, and their lives change.
All because they were using the alchemical power of their life-force energy, which then quantum leaps every part of their lives.
It becomes a force that rises from within you and PROPELS you forward in your life.
It’s not something you need to consciously try and do, like: Hey! I’m going to masturbate these extra pounds away!”
You just need to go deep into your and your partner’s genitals and sexual self.
And in Anami Land, your progress sexually is a barometer for how many of your blockages you have cleared.
You cannot reach the sacred land of the holy fuck if you have’nt done the deep internal work.
And wonderfully, the deep “internal work” is what’s going to help you also blast through your blockages faster than any other personal growth tool available to you.
Yes, you really can fuck the pain away.
And save thousands—tens of thousands of dollars on therapy AND plant medicine AND nervous system resets and get much farther in the process.
Here are the Pillars of Sexual Shadow Work in Anami Land.
Extended and deeper orgasms i.e. Vaginal orgasms for women and full-body, extended orgasms for men.
If you’ve been following my work for any length of time, you’ve likely heard me talk about the importance of extended sex dates.
A big part of the Anami RX is having a weekly 3-hour sex dates, quarterly sex weekends and annual sex weeks.
Having un-rushed, uninterrupted time and space is essential to tapping into these deeper experiences.
Where you can let your unresolved issues and emotions rise to the surface and alchemize them.
You wouldn’t think of doing a 5-minute therapy session or a 3-minute plant medicine trip, would you?
No. Because yo know you wouldn’t get anywhere.
So when you start to look at your sex life as a type of therapy and alchemy to help you heal, you also wouldn’t think that a 3 minute pump and dump session is going to have any lasting impact either.
Sex dates ought to last at least an hour and intercourse anywhere from 30 min as a quickie and I’d say an hour PLUS.
2) Fantasy and BDSM play.
Our fantasies are a great source of information for us.
A direct line to our shadow sides.
For so many women, the theme of “being taken” allows them to indulge their full, sexual salacious selves.
It gives them permission because you know, they didn’t really do it.
Someone MADE them do it.
And with all the restrictions on female sexuality and the Madonna/whore complex, being a “bad girl” who is forced to do naughty things is one of the only ways they can allow themselves into this energy.
Until they fully liberate themselves and OWN their voracious appetites.
BDSM is a fabulous tool for both men and women to unlock our “dark sides” and let them out to play.
So many people have so many inaccurate and cliched ideas about playing in the realm of BDSM.
And then 50 Shades of Grey came along and made it sexy and acceptable to the mainstream.
200 million gushing pussies and a billion dollar franchise can’t be wrong.
Wayyyyy before 50 Shades came along, I was exploring CONSCIOUS BDSM play with my partner.
We dove very deep and it was some of the most powerful work I’ve ever done in my life.
The essence of BDSM is AMPLIFYING our archetypal masculine and feminine energies.
We look at how to embrace and enjoy these differences and truly OWN what it means to live, love and fuck in our glorious male and female bodies.
Ad infnitum.
Women can explore their softer, receptive feminine sides in more submissive play.
And men can practice living in their masculine strength and power through dominating their woman.
Most women have fantasies of being “taken” by a man. Or more than one.
This can extend into being coerced into having sex, to “rape” fantasies.
Super common.
All the women orgasming to the 50 Shades books and films were acknowledging that coming off of several decades of egalitarian gender neutral fucking bullshit, was doing NOTHING for them in the bedroom.
They. Wanted. To. Be. Manhandled.
You know. By a man.
They wanted to be picked up, thrown over their powerful man’s shoulder and ravaged.
They wanted to FEEL his strength and unflappability.
You can say all you want about hoping a man will give you a consent form to fill out before having sex.
But no one wants that.
Not really.
No one wants to fuck a guy who asks if “pretty please can he put his wee wee into your vee vee”
That’s going to create a tumbleweed vagina.
And men are craving a woman who knows how to truly, madly, deeply surrender.
I spoke about both of these deep, archetypal desires in my recent episodes:
The 5 Sexiest Things a Man Can Do
And
The 5 Sexiest Things a Woman Can Do
**
I personally spent a full year very immersed in the BDSM world.
I acted out numerous—I’d say pretty much ALL of my fantasies—both public and private.
My partner and I would talk about areas I was turned on by AND had insecurities in and we’d use these as roadmaps to mock up scenarios where I could experience and face these things.
It was massively arousing—and sometimes massively challenging, as it was helping me to see where I’d pick up mental conditioning over the decades that needed to be released.
But it was mostly massively arousing—and I’d be demon slaying and become more fearless and unfuckwithable with every adventure we had.
All of these things helped me to “come out” sexually.
I crossed the threshold that I talk about so much, where you enter into the territory of being truly well-fucked and you know you’ve arrived when you no longer give a shit what anyone thinks about you.
Your own internal compass is all that matters.
Your truth is all that matters.
And if other people aren’t into it, who cares?
Find better people.
Having the “juice” of your sexual energy to fuel these therapeutic adventures quantum leaps your growth like nothing else.
**
In the WFW Salon, I share a lot more details about these life-changing experiences I had and how pivotal they were in my evolution.
I was living my own 50 Shades of Grey relationship before that became a cultural phenomenon!
3) The third pillar of Anami Sexual Shadow work is: La petite mort; the little death and rebirth.
When I emerged out of these wild role play experiences, I was changed.
When I have cataclysmic cervical orgasms, I am changed.
I often talk about la petite mort; the little death and rebirth.
Your deep sexual experiences and orgasms change you.
They break you down and allow you to reassemble yourself as the truest version of who you really are.
I laugh when I hear all these people talking about their “nervous system resets”.
Breathwork, ice baths, blah blah blah.
I mean look, these are all positive tools.
But they are child’s play.
NOTHING resets your ANS—your autonomic nervous system—like orgasm.
Nothing.
And the deeper the orgasm, the deeper the reset.
Meaning, if you bust out a party clitoral orgasm or jerk off to porn and pass out, you’ll be getting minimal reset.
If you have an extended, gourmet sex date and multiple cervical orgasms and full-body orgasms as a man?
Talk about vagus nerve regulation!
The cervix in women is connected to the vagus nerve.
It’s the VERY BEST vagus nerve reset you can get.
Show me a woman who is having cervical orgasms on the regular and I’ll show you a woman who is calm, relaxed, easy going, flowing and floating through life, connected to her intuition and highest self.
She’s learned how to harness the power of her feminine energy to draw and attract people, opportunities and abundant into her life—all “falling into her lap” because her lap is what’s attracting it.
That’s a healthy vagus nerve in action.
Connecting the spiritual and material worlds.
From cervix to crown.
For men, they begin to occupy their highest and healthiest masculine self, and release their fears of “too much”.
Nah, guys. We want it all.
And we want to empower you to give it to us.
We want the wildness and the hardness and the manhandling.
And then you can channel that energy out into the world, dominating in business, fitness and in life.
People in my work often talk about how their sexual experiences become therapeutic oultets.
They spontaneously heal old traumas, change belief systems and behaviours just by having deep, cataclysmic sex.
Your bed becomes your therapist, business coach, personal trainer and investment banker all in one.
**
In ALL of my salons, I show people how to do your sexual shadow work to illuminate your blind spots—and your dark spots—and alchemize them into power.
Everything that we haven’t processed shows up as obstacles in our lives somehow.
And everything we do process becomes our strengths that PROPEL us forward into life and in fulfilling our deepest gifts in the world.
Next up on the Anami Roster is my legendary How to Be a Well-F**ked Woman Salon.
In the salon we explore:
- How to clear your sexual blocks
- Quantum techniques for sexual shadow work
- Conscious BDSM practices to illuminate your “dark sides” and explore the power of surrender
- How to have the deeper female orgasms—the deepest ANS and vagus nerve resets there are
- Using Taoist and Tantric sexual energy practices to harness your pro-creative power
- Tapping into your feminine power to achieve more by learning the art of surrenderThe WFW salon opens for registration in June. Get on our mailing list to be notified when.You’ll also receive access to the WFW free video preview series with multi-orgasmic techniques you can practice tonight.
Signup today to become a Well-F**ked Woman!
