Vagina of the Year
Here are my picks for top vagina highlights of the year.
1) “Most Likely to Change and Turn On a Vagina” Award.
The jade egg.
Yoni eggs got super famous this year.
This little beauty that I’ve been swinging around the world,
made more global headlines earlier this year, when it was the centre of controversy.
Some underfucked and sexually inexperienced OBGYNs thought that putting things into vaginas was gross.
Actually, not putting things in the vagina is a serious disease that leads to FUKME, vaginas falling out, psychotic episodes and other mishaps.
STRONG VAGINA = AWESOME VAGINA
And now, all the girls want things in their vaginas.
Truth—and better orgasms—prevails.
Vaginal Kung Fu runs again in late January. If you want to get a headstart, check out our Yoni Egg Kit and Salonette.
2) The “Stopped Taking Shit Vagina” Award.
For millennia—gosh, maybe since forever?—female sexuality has been commodified.
Everywhere you look, female sexuality—rarely male sexuality—is used to buy and sell things.
There is pretty much a hooker in every single Hollywood movie.
All the foodie girls on Instagram have to get their tits in the photos with their acai bowls.
Tits = likes and followers.
For every woman who didn’t fuck Harvey Weinstein, there would be 10 who did, and whose careers were boosted because of it.
Women have been conditioned to believe that their sexuality is a commodity.
Why? Because they receive this message since birth.
It is for sale, and something they can trade on to get what they want and need in life: jobs, husbands, social standing.
As a gift that is freely given, sexuality remains pure.
When it’s denigrated in other ways, everyone suffers. It’s like a nuclear meltdown—an inversion and misuse of great power.
3) “Strong Vaginas Make Bank” Award.
Wonder Woman became the highest-grossing superhero origin film of all time, bringing in a whopping $821.74 million dollars at the the box office this year.
I haven’t seen this movie, and likely won’t, and so I can’t comment on whether this is a super-feminist triumph or what it is, but the fact that a strong female protagonist and ass-kicker carried a film to this place, is awesome.
4) “The Moral of the Story” and our “Vagina of the Year” Award:
Is a noteworthy piece at Art Basel in Miami, and the banner image above.
It’s a neon-light sculpture by Suzy Kellems Dominik at The Nautilus, South Beach. ?
Vulva + fireworks + dove = Orgasmic vaginas create world peace. ?
When vaginas are functioning as they are meant to—regularly pleasured, orgasmic, full of feeling and life, operating as a voice, like the “gut feeling” but instead, the “vag tingle”—then the world finds balance.
Because I don’t have to tell you, that an out-of-sorts, cranky, non-orgasming and underfucked vagina, makes life difficult for everyone and everything around it.
Or, it just sits in a corner and rots.
Literally to the point where it, and its compatriots—ovaries, uterus—needs to get cut out.
We don’t want that, do we?
So go and pleasure your and someone else’s vagina.
Here are my top blog and video posts this year for you to go and spread the vagina love and knowledge:?
1) The Biggest Sign of Being a Well-F**ked Woman
2) Are Periods and Menopause Supposed to Suck?
4) Is Celibacy Ever Good for You?
1) How to Give a Handjob. With Your Vagina.
2) Use Jade Yoni Eggs for Better Sex.
3) Coo-Ching! My Vagina Makes Cash!
4) Squirting 101: All you need to know about female ejaculation.
Now go forth and make some vaginas happy. That’s the best Xmas gift you can give.