Who Wants to Be a Millionaire Vagina?
Now why would you want a millionaire vagina?
A vagina that knows its worth!
A vag that knows how to throw it’s weight around and get what it wants.
A vag that draws love, partners, opportunities and cash to it like a magnet.
Sex, money and creativity are all connected.
As you’ve often hear me say, sexual energy is life-force energy—the energy that creates new life.
When you learn how to tap into and harness that energy, you have the creative power of the universe at your fingertips.
You can use that energy to shape and manifest the life of your dreams.
And when you and your vagina are firing on all cylinders, you increase you cash flow. Your true nature is accessed, and you are able to use your voice and give your gifts to the universe.
The universe loves that. So it rewards you with money/energy/cash.
Let’s play a little multiple-choice game o’vagina.
1) Which of these is the best way to create a seven-figure income?
A) Find a rich husband.
B) Use a jade egg.
C) Buy lottery tickets.
D) Get an MBA.
I’ll give you a hint. According to the rules of How to Be a Millionaire Vagina:
“The ‘D’ answer is always incorrect and humorous.”
It sure is!
If you picked, “Use a jade egg” you are correct!!
Awakening your vagina as it was meant to be used—all the time, and with love and care—brings your creative and orgasmic potential to life.
2) What is the best way to heal your vagina of trauma and disconnection?
A) Yoni massage.
B) Lube it up. Force it to have sex when it’s not wet or ready. Just make it do what you want!
C) Use a jade egg.
D) Go see an underfucked and sexually inexperienced OBGYN who will “heal” your uterine and vaginal problems by removing your uterus and ovaries. Maybe your cervix too—if they like you and give you a package deal!
Remember, selection “D” is the most ridiculous answer of course!
Really, is the true expert the one with a mile-high pile of discarded uteruses in the corner of their office?
What do they do with those things anyway? Sell them on the black market? Do they try to pawn them off as counterfeit shark fins for the insatiable demand for shark fin soup??
If you picked, “Use a jade egg”, you are correct!!
But wait… it’s a trick question.
“A” is also correct.
By massaging your yoni with love, skill and attention, you can dislodge and transform trauma which has been embedded in there for decades.
The vagina holds years of emotional and physical unresolved stuff.
You can shake it off and restore your vagina to its true, happy self, by the “Fastest Finger First” technique.
All your fingers are good, actually. Slow, medium, fast. Pressing, kneading, pulsing.
The entire yoni is a reflexology map connected to organs and emotions.
Consciously stimulating it is the key to the queendom.
3) What is the best way to get an orgasmic, pleasurable, lubricating and ejaculating vagina?
A) Buy one at the vagina shop. It’s called vaginoplasty—cut your vagina up and sew it back together. Stitch the fucker into oblivion and create heaps of scar tissue, never to orgasm again.
B) Listen to ignorant and sexually inexperienced so-called “sex experts” who tell you to forego the vagina and just stick with the clitoris.
C) Use a jade egg.
D) Do your Kegels.
There are some pretty hilarious answers here, but the only true one is:
Use a jade egg!
By increasing strength, articulation and blood flow through the use of a yoni egg, you lubricate and (vaginal) orgasm more easily, and amplify your pleasure potential—tenfold.
The answers to most—if not all—of your vaginal problems lie within you.
Like most profound wisdom, the solution is in the problem.
By cultivating a conscious relationship and frequent practice with your vagina, you’ll wake up its true pleasure, transformational and seven-figure potential.
In Vaginal Kung Fu, I walk you through a weekly vaginal strengthening routine, as well as give you:
This salon dives deep into everything you need to have a strong, confident and powerful vagina. We go into the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual elements of sexual healing and how to use that power, including:
- Weekly, guided, jade egg practice.
- Self-yoni massage techniques.
- Sexual reflexology of the vulva and vagina.
- Breast massage instructions according to Taoist energy meridians and healthy breast care practices to tone, lift and enlarge breasts.
- Orgasmic pleasure zones of the vagina including different sexual positions to remedy different emotional and physical issues.
- Renegade healing treatments for reproductive ailments.
- Taoist practices to reduce menstrual challenges.
The salon is open for registration next week. You can check out the free video series now and get started on some vaginal power exercises tonight.