Why Everyone Needs Sex School
Going to school to study something doesn’t mean that you aren’t any good at it.
I’ve been doing yoga for eight years. I’m pretty good at it.
Last weekend I attended an intensive workshop to get better at it.
I wanted to break down certain poses, get really clear on what feels right and lines up correctly in my body.
Plus, I don’t know what I don’t know.
My practice feels deeper and stronger because of that six hours of focused and expert attention.
The typical sex education in North America is: sex can kill you and sex will get you pregnant.
Now off you go! Have fun kids!!
The rest is up to you to figure out.
Like anything in life that you want to master or at least understand, you have to study it.
Sex is no different.
While some of us do come into this world more in touch with our sexuality, given the global f**ked up sexual climate, we ALL have to put time and energy into unveiling our true sexual selves.
The only people I know who I would call “sexually self-actualized” have worked at it.
They decided that they were tired of the same patterns showing up in their intimate relationships and that they were going to change them. They committed to studying sex and intimacy and communication and psychology and ANYTHING else that would help them on their journeys.
They committed to doing that until the made it through to the other side.
I’m one of these people. I can count the people I know like this on one hand.
Whether it’s books or workshops or videos or hours and hours of experimentation, you have to put the time in to learn. And to unlearn.
Sexual desire is natural and healthy. The messages we receive about it usually aren’t.
That’s where the unlearning comes in.
We have so few positive sexual role models out there.
So when you find one that resonates with you, jump on him. Or her.
I’ve often learned and unlearned a lot through my lovers.
I had an urge to explore BDSM for years. I finally met a man who was an expert. That was a life-changing relationship.
Another lover and I ventured into every possible territory (and orifice) available to us. Neither of us had done some of those things before. We just felt our way through them.
I’ve taken workshops. I’ve read books.
There are lots of complementary practices that can increase your depth and range as a lover.
Yoga is one of these tools. It has many benefits you can apply to a richer sex life; so many in fact that I now incorporate yoga into my intimacy retreats. I also just completed an online video series for My Yoga Online called “Yoga for Better Sex.”
Now I run my own e-courses. This year is going to feature a host of them. You can complete your entire sex education this year!
Throughout the year, I’ll be focusing on men, super-vaginas and of course, revisiting the Coming Together: Lifelong Passionate Sex for Couples
Get on it boys and girls. You can all become sex doctorates.
I may even issue degrees.
~ Kxx
