TRANSCRIPT: TALKING HEADS: WHEN GENITALS SPEAK
Something I saw early on in my work, is that our genitals reflect the truth of who we are.
And sexually, they do this moment to moment.
If a woman isn’t wet, she’s not ready or turned on enough.
If a man isn’t hard, he’s not present and fully occupying his cock.
In the allopathic view, these indications are totally irrelevant.
Meaning, they attribute NO symbolic messages to dry vaginas or softcocks.
And they encourage people to ignore and override anything their genitals have to say.
And in Anami Land, we attribute ALL meaning to these things.
As in, our genitals are oracles.
And when they speak, they reveal our innermost truths.
Not only is a dry vagina not aroused.
It’s also showing a woman who is out of touch with her feminine flow.
She is dry, stuck and immobile. Inflexible.
Lifeless, like a tumbleweed drifting through the desert.
If a man struggles with getting solid erections, not only is he disconnected from the full power of his sexuality, but the full power of his masculinity.
He doesn’t OCCUPY it. And thus he doesn’t occupy his cock either.
When a woman is in her full salaciousness, connecting to her sensual energy, basking in her feminine light, she GUSHES.
She’s perpetually wet. All the time.
Her yoni is supple and responsive.
Ripe, sensitive with exquisite feeling.
Lubricating naturally, just from the sound of her lovers voice.
From seeing him look at her from across the room.
From imagining him touching her.
Panties soaked. Right then and there.
THAT is a healthy, pussy.
Our genitals are barometers.
They show us the EXACT climate we are experiencing here and now, and in this stage of our lives.
An inhabited cock is solid. Unflappable.
Like the man.
An extension of the man.
When a man is fully inhabiting his masculine energy, he fully inhabits his erections.
Wild. Proud. BURSTING at the seams.
He stands firm in his convictions.
He’ll stand up to anyone, anywhere, anytime.
He’s pulsing with masculine, raw power and strength.
He doesn’t get bowled over and cave with the slightest provocation.
And sexually, he doesn’t just come because he got a glimpse of her ass in that certain position and he just couldn’t contain himself.
Nah.
Weak man. Weak cock.
Instead, he can go the distance. As long as it takes.
As far as it takes.
To win.
***
When a man or woman is especially stuck, the energy flow inverts even more.
To the extent that they begin to SEE these blockages.
Stuck or clogged sexual energy manifests as some kind of ailment in the reproductive organs.
Ranging from endometriosis to difficult periods and menopause, to cysts and growths in women.
And in men, PE or ED or prostate issues.
****
This is why I’ve always railed against the use of these false stimulants.
No Viagra. No lube. No hormones.
Not necessary.
Because your genitals are messengers.
They are the barometers of your truth.
You can choose to listen to what they have to say and open up that channel of communication.
Or you can shut it down.
You can heal and bridge whatever gap of dissociation or injury has been built up over the years.
Or you can slather on the lube, guzzle the Viagra, assume that your body be dumb dumb, and by so doing, you FURTHER reinforce that gap between YOUR deeper truth and your body’s expression of it.
The foundation of my work assumes that our bodies are
- Infinitely wise
- They tell the truth
- And they are our allies. Not our adversaries.
IF the trust between you and your body has been ruptured over time, you can repair it.
If you’ve had a series of experiences and are living in a place of chronic stress and un-integrated trauma, this is the product of never healing and alchemizing anything from your past that’s created the rupture.
One of the most powerful ways to awaken your genitals, bring them online and have them function as these divine messengers is through yoni and lingam massage.
This goes far beyond “hand jobs” in that the intention is totally different.
The aim here is to de-numb, awaken, activate and heal.
You can do these massages on yourself.
But the best is to perform them on each other.
Through your loving touch and your focused attention, you bring out the impurities, the suppressed and they’re illuminated and integrated.
Catalyzed by your emotional and sexual connection.
I teach guided, step-by-step yoni and lingam massages in the Coming Together for Couples Salon.
These are amazing to do with each other on your sex dates.
Great as foreplay, but also AS a stand alone sex date.
Your genitals are the essence of who you are.
Most people are totally cut off and numbed out from them.
And you can help each other to reconnect and wildly increase your sexual pleasure, and heal whatever suppressed issues you’ve lodged there, liberating them.
**
I’ve spoken before about how I have separate relationships with cocks.
Meaning, I’m in love with the man.
And I”m also in love with his cock, as a distinct entity.
There’s three of us in the relationship.
The only threesome I’d ever recommend.
Well, actually there’s four or five or six of us, counting my yoni and breasts.
These parts of us become so alive, so animated, that we communicate with them and develop a language and relationship that is its own thing.
Our Well-F**ked All Star couple in today’s episode, Carla and Pracarsh, are going to tell you all about their experiences in doing this.
They found my work early on in their relationship and applied Anami principles devotedly.
You could say they have an Anami marriage.
They’ve gone deeper into these things than I’ve seen a LOT of people do.
And the insights they’ve gained through it all are mind and body-blowing.
One of the major themes in our conversation is talking about the relationships they have with their own and each other’s genitals.
They’ve become so intimate with each other’s genitals as truth-telling, multi-dimensional portals.
We talk about all of this today.
We also have a solo episode with Pracarsh where he unpacks the entire journey with his cock waking up.
Which includes healing circumcision trauma and massively growing his cock.
That one is called: “My Dick Grew So Big!”
Which is Season 7, Episode 26.
Well-F**ked All Stars Carla and Pracarsh
KIM: All right, welcome. It’s such a pleasure to have you both.
CARLA: Good to see you, Kim. Thanks for having us.
PRACARSH: Good to see you, Kim. Thank you.
KIM: Amazing. So you guys have done Coming Together, and you’ve had some epic, epic breakthroughs, and transformations. We’ve already spoken with Pracarsh before and had some amazing insights into his growth in all ways, [laughs], and love to hear from the two of you.
And by that, the double-meaning there is 100% accurate, some incredible cock growth.
But let’s talk about the two of you together and your relationship and what kind of shifts that you’ve seen through going through all of these processes.
CARLA: Yeah. It’s definitely been a crazy, healing journey and a journey of coming—not just coming together, but coming back to ourselves, so that we can actually come together. So that all of the stuff that was very unconsciously between us could be addressed.
An Anami-inspired marriage
We got married and about six months, seven months later, we did the salon. It really started our marriage with the philosophy—the Anami philosophy. It was interesting because before we started the salon, we had a lot of intimations about a lot of the things that we were going to work through in the salon. We were already kind of—we had already found your work, we were already kind of applying a lot of things, and naturally, we were going through our own process, but it was very chaotic and we didn’t really have a sense of direction even though things were moving.
Grow or die: demon hunting for the win
CARLA: Yeah. Because what happens is like of course like you have the so-called honeymoon phase. You begin a relationship and it’s all bliss and it’s all beautiful and it’s all love, and then there comes a point where like all the demons start kind of showing up suddenly.
KIM: [Laughs] Yes.
CARLA: All of a sudden you’re like, “Wait.” But actually, that was the phase that we were in right when we started the salon. Where it was like, “Oh, okay, wait. All of my patterns are coming out, all of your patterns are coming out, and what is this?” We both kind of knew like, okay, we both had a sense of like we have to be responsible for our own traumas, our own patterns. We have to take responsibility for ourselves.
But I think that we learned in this process is
How much of a beautiful healing opportunity it is when those demons come out.
PRACARSH: That is something I think that also really solidified for us in doing Coming Together that actually, facing your demons is an aspect of beauty. It’s not something to turn away from, it’s something to actually welcome. Because your life is essentially saying, “Let’s see, when you fell in love, I gave you this very beautiful honeymoon-like experience. Do you want to continue this? Yes? Then please clear all this.”
So because initially in a relationship you get a glimpse of how good it can actually be, the whole relationship, starting, middle, and end. Then you have to clear some stuff along the way.
KIM: Right. I think that’s where people get lost, is that these things start to come up and they think there’s something wrong or wrong with the relationship or they buy into this story that the honeymoon phase is just—there’s this whole narrative in “science” that it’s nature’s way of tricking us to get us to come together to reproduce and then it’s like, “Ha-ha, joke’s on you, bitch,” and basically just makes everything terrible after that and you just have to kind of grit your way through it.
I’ve always said it doesn’t make sense and if you actually can then, as you say, accept that invitation to grow and you have an agreement as a couple to grow together and use the relationship, the power of your love for each other and your connection, to then illuminate and alchemize these wounds and issues, you grow even stronger, you grow closer together, you evolve as people and your relationship deepens.
All of these things happen if we’re willing to look at these as moments of opportunity instead of something to just run and hide from.
CARLA: Yeah, exactly.
PRACARSH: Exactly. I think this also comes from, I think what we realized, I think, a **** [0:05:09.3] that you move through. Once you’re feeling that you cannot trust—like she felt that she could not trust life.
CARLA: It’s interesting because I could’ve moved through all these blocks on my own, like that’s work that I could’ve done for sure by myself, and the moment was right. But doing it together, you get into like the nitty-gritty of all the ways that life—like you’re resisting life or you’re resisting flow or you’re resisting just like the natural flow of yourself and your energy and the energy of life in a very pointed way.
Honestly, yeah, it’s a kind of a—in the moment it can feel very difficult and it can feel very tense. But I think with a lot of the tools that you’ve taught us, and through our commitment to each other and our commitment to our relationship and our commitment to growth, and maintaining in those moments of difficulty, like the perspective that we’re here to grow. There’s a higher reason why we’re together. We’re not just here to like, I don’t know, live out some weird, programmed fantasy of some relationship. We’re here to actually create a life together in alignment with God or with energy or with the universe, and the universe within us.
All those things kept us really grounded to move through all of this.
KIM: I love it. A lot of the tenets in the Anami philosophy then are about like radical honesty and sharing—bringing everything to the table, to the bed. Was that difficult for you at first? Or was that something you already did? Were you challenged to do it more?
PRACARSH: I think we were challenged to do it more.
CARLA: Yeah.
How honest is “radically honest”?
PRACARSH: Definitely. Because with radical honesty, we thought that we were honest totally, like I am honest to you, you are honest to me, and in some sense, yes, we were.
But then when you notice all these patterns and when you really start noticing these subtle places where you hide, like that voice in you that says that let’s say something and then say, “Don’t tell it to your wife,” or “It’s not important to tell it to her.”
Actually, doubling down on those places and in those moments choosing that, “Okay, this feels very uncomfortable for me. This feels like I don’t know how you receive this, but I’m telling you.” Remembering that we are on a journey of growth. That actually our bond is unbreakable. Like fundamentally, it’s unbreakable. So once we remember that—
KIM: Why do you think it’s unbreakable? I mean, people might not agree with that idea. Why do you think your bond is unbreakable?
CARLA: I mean, it’s also, it’s both like something we—like, okay, the way we feel is that we can—this may be a bit of a **** [0:08:21.6] but we programmed our beliefs into us. So we choose, we get to choose how we want to experience. There was a lot of what you say in the **** of us having exactly this very vulnerable conversation. Sometimes you’re like,
“Oh my god, I’m going to admit this incredibly shameful thing to you. I have to tell you, and I have no idea what’s going to happen on the other end of this. This could break the relationship.”
And so us developing a faith that, okay, honesty can never break our relationship like that.
If it’s meant to split, like if we’re meant to go separate ways, that’s a very different thing. That’s like us coming into an agreement where we—like there’s honesty in that process. But like a moment of breakage happening from honesty, we have learned that it’s not—like sometimes the highest service, or the highest form of relationship you can have to someone is being away from them. Is leaving the relationship, for example.
But you still have that soul level connection with that person and that soul level connection, still, like we feel, exists, and you learn so much more like after you break after or something, like from previous breakups. I learned more about myself and about my relationship with my pattern post-break-up than I did in the actual relationship sometimes. That connection was still there.
For us, we just believe that we—
Only dishonesty can break the relationship
Our bond in that sense is unbreakable because like only we can break it.
Only our dishonesty, only our block from each other, only our, I don’t know, resistance to each other, can be the thing that breaks it.
Otherwise, it’s stable and good.
KIM: Your dishonesty—let me repeat this—is the only thing that can break that bond?
CARLA: Exactly, yeah.
PRACARSH: Truly. Because your honesty is always putting you exactly where you have to be. If after that honesty you’re meant to stay, you’ll stay. If after that honesty, you’re meant to leave, you’ll leave.
But at least you’ll be fucking honest, finally. At least you will know that “Okay, this is where I’m at. This is an accurate temperature reading of where am I?”
But lying is just then—
CARLA: It’s like really weird and the process of radical honesty for us in particular has been the total initiation. Like you said,
Dishonesty distorts reality
We thought we were being honest to each other, and we were. Like we were being sincere, but we were still, in those little places, hiding or making like not white lies, but maybe not fully admitting.
And we saw in real time how even doing that creates this like distortion in reality
because you don’t know where that person is actually standing, whether they’re performing something that they think you should here, or whether it’s real, like whatever it is that they’re saying.
So when you’re both fully radically honest, even if it’s very vulnerable, the energy between you stays so clear and that’s like your metaphor of clearing the glass. Like that’s literally it. The energy is not distorted.
So you’re able to, if you need to, exit the relationship. Where if you need to make a different decision, you and yourself are clear to take that next step for yourself, or whatever it is. Yeah.
KIM: I was thinking that the reasons why people lie, I think there’s two. One is that it will make me not look very good. I might not feel good about the way something makes me look. The second would be that I’m afraid of hurting you. I’m afraid of saying something that you’re going to feel offended by and hurt by. I think those are the two only real reasons why we wouldn’t be honest.
PRACARSH: Yes. I think I would even go as far as to say that there is only one reason, it’s the first one. Because we’re thinking how like we will look. I noticed this in me. Whenever I’m thinking or I’m doing something to not hurt you, it’s actually I’m doing something to not hurt me or an image of me or a projection of me.
Hiding from ourselves and each other
I think through your salon we’ve also learned how to not hide from ourselves,
which isn’t the only **** [0:12:47.4] been on before the salon.
Because I think before the salon, we were together, we would feel massive energy also, because we’ve always been like that. But I think parts of us were really hiding.
CARLA: There was a lot of constriction, like the space between our relationship felt like clear as we moved through the salon and there was a lot of blocks to clear between us. But actually, most of the blocks that came, or most of the things that we had to clear were with ourselves internally. We have things that we have brought to the relationship.
KIM: Is there any example you feel comfortable giving?
CARLA: Yeah. Well, there is a few things. Like with me, one of the main things was like—one of the things that radically changed for me was my whole idea of sex. I thought that sex was like, I don’t know, like I knew that what you call like junk-food sex, like just getting off, was like not it. I knew that there’s something more. I didn’t know exactly what, but I was like, “This doesn’t feel right.”
Releasing stuck emotions in the breasts
But we’re so programmed through so many different mediums to believe that we have to do sex in a certain way and my body held on to all of that. And held onto also a lot of past traumas and different things like that.
I remember when we first—and in the first months of our marriage—like I had a lot of tension in my breasts. Like he would massage my breasts, and I would be crying from the pain of how much was stored in them.
PRACARSH: But before crying, she would break into hysterical laughter. I would be like gently rubbing her nipples and she would break into hysterical laughter.
CARLA: I thought it was like—it was so funny, I thought I was like possessed. I was like, “What is happening?” Like the worst tickle attack ever, but just laughter. But then what would happen is like the laughter would happen and then there was like a moment it would break and then I would just break down crying.
It was so much tension and block around my heart of past traumas, feeling unloved
or feeling like—especially feeling like I had to be overly-responsible for myself or be like the strong, independent woman, and that actually had created a lot of like little calcification around my breasts.
Also, like some, I don’t know, there was also like some past-life things. Like some things that I didn’t ever fully understand. But I would get like intimations of in the emotional release.
Sentient breasts
Then as we kept doing that consistently, my breasts have completely changed. Like they are so sentient now.
I can feel energy—like now sometimes I’ll still break out into like hysterical laughter, but like that break of like that drop won’t happen as intensely. It’ll just kind of like move on to something else. I can feel the energy moving through my body now. It was literally, like there was a physical block, an emotional block, and a spiritual block, like an energetic block that was existing in them that needed that like attention. I had brought that, like that wasn’t because of our relationship, I had brought that from my past into the relationship. That was constriction that I was holding. It had nothing to do with him.
We alchemize our past wounds together through sex
KIM: Right. And the beauty of that is then collectively, together, you’re working on integrating, alchemizing, upleveling that.
CARLA: Yeah, exactly.
PRACARSH: Yeah. And we see it—like so one of the barometers through which we also see a difference, like how we’re shifted, is the very physical aspect. Like physically, her breasts have changed.
Our genitals change size and shape as we release any stuck energy in them
CARLA: Like physically, his dick has changed. It’s crazy.
PRACARSH: Like we’ve become **** [0:17:02.0] come inwards a little bit more. Like these are very like tangible differences that we see in our own bodies.
CARLA: As we release this energy.
PRACARSH: As we release energy, yeah.
KIM: Yeah.
CARLA: As well as the blocks. It’s really crazy.
Blocks malform your body
PRACARSH: So clear the blocks, like literally malform you. Like an emotional block, a limiting block, literally malforms you and your body compensates around that and gets a weird shape because the body is also like trying to support you. But yeah.
KIM: Very well said, I love that idea. I speak about the holograph of the body all the time and then I love being able to hear people share their experiences that show exactly that. That then as they’re using the healing and loving and procreative, sexual energy, that that’s actually—and they’re liberating that, mobilizing it, that it’s creating a physical, tangible, objectively measurable shift in the body. And especially any of the sexual organs.
CARLA: Yeah.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
KIM: We have spoken about this before in another episode but given that you’ve just mentioned it and we’re talking already about these presentations and then shifts, we’d love to hear about the cock rebirth for you, Pracarsh.
PRACARSH: Yeah, sure.
His cock keeps growing bigger
CARLA: He’s actually grown even more since we advised you.
KIM: [Laughs]
CARLA: It’s been crazy. [Laughs] We literally couldn’t believe it when it happened.
PRACARSH: Yeah, yeah. It’s actually funny, like after doing your course how many things just seem second nature now. Like, yeah, resistance. Like you do something, like I feel like you do a **** [0:18:53.4] and then you just like get normalized there.
CARLA: And it like integrates with you usually.
PRACARSH: So normal life, yeah, this is just how it’s supposed to be. It’s taken me like a moment to also like recall it, but yeah, I think before the salon came, I think one of the real challenges I was facing is I was holding a lot of stress in my body and my masculine was very weak. And my masculine was very weak not because like I was trying to be feminine or all of that things, it was not. But just it had not found the activation somehow.
And I remember in the salon, that’s also the first time I talked to you. It was, I think, the polarity week. That like sparked something in me. I was like, “Whoa, okay, like there is something for me here.”
PRACARSH: Why am I not doing this? And I think once we started—once I started stepping into my masculine, I think literally my dick responded. It was also true her tending him, her really giving him, like gently massaging him, energetically moving things through him, putting intention, giving him love, that I feel that he was maybe—he needed.
And so as a combination of both of those things, of me stepping into my masculine, and also her pouring so much love to him, he’s literally grown. He grew through the salon, and then afterwards also. He’s just like—
CARLA: Kept growing.
PRACARSH: Like yeah, basically kept growing. It’s like…
CARLA: Yes. We randomly checked in and we’re like, “Wait, how is this bigger?” [Laughs] But I think it’s literally like what has felt like he energetically was like—he wasn’t compressed. It was literally just compression.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
CARLA: And all of a sudden when there’s the permission and the energy flow starts again and there’s like that love and attending, it like blooms. Like it just comes back into what its fullness is supposed to be.
PRACARSH: It feels safe. It’s like in safety, when you feel safe, you relax, your breath normalizes, and people feel like you start opening. So I think it’s that and that’s happened to my dick and also to my body.
CARLA: And to our life.
PRACARSH: And to our life. It’s like every layer, like since doing the salon, I think it’s been like a flower unfolding and all those layers showing up in our lives. It’s been kind of like that. Like us learning to speak through it.
CARLA: That’s one layer opening.
PRACARSH: That’s one layer opening.
CARLA: Being vulnerable, another layer opening, and so on.
KIM: Let’s back up a little bit. I want to hear more about bringing that out into your life, but I know that Carla, like part of that journey with the cock growth and recognition was literally in your hands in terms of the lingam massages and the connection that you’re having. So from your perspective, I’d love to hear some of that story and your relationship that grew. Having that relationship directly with his cock.
She has conversations with his cock
CARLA: Yeah. I have my own relationship with his cock. Like we talk. We have conversations that sometimes he’s not even aware of because it’s like at the beginning his cock was like, “I can’t trust this guy, so I can **** [0:22:58.8].” And so I’m going to tell you, these things are like these things to do, which is really funny. We were having our own relationship.
But I literally think it was that, like when we started doing the lingam massage at the beginning,
there was a lot of like tension and the tension was also emotional tension, like restriction. There was like a circumcision scar and other things like that.
Just going in and just with not a lot of expectation or anything, but just a lot of devotion. Going in and just being like, “I’m here. I’m here. You just do what you need to do. I’m here to just move the energy.” And eventually, what would happen was like
His dick would start directing me as to how to move the energy.
Something that was really important for me to realize in that process was that this is like pleasure and sexual pleasure is like a byproduct of all of this clearing. Like it’s not the focus, which for me, used to be the programming that I had, which was like I have to make sure that this person feels pleasure. And when that would happen, I’d hit a wall, and like his dick would be like, “No, like we’re done. That’s not going to fly anymore.”
Genitals as barometers of truth
KIM: Your genitals become also the barometers of truth. Unless you’re in that high frequency of radical, pure honesty, they also don’t respond as well or even shut down.
CARLA: Yeah, they shut down.
PRACARSH: That’s what is happening to us the whole salon. Like whenever we would be misaligned.
CARLA: They know. Like, “We’re not, no. You guys made an agreement, you made a commitment, like we’re holding you all accountable. Like we’re not going to work. We’re not going to function like this.”
I had to like maintain—like I had to learn how to be in myself fully. Like I didn’t care what he was feeling. He could be crying, like he could be feeling pleasure, like whatever, but I had to be fully in myself to feel where the energy needed to go and how the energy needed to move. As that happened, the energy literally just kept going. The more I was able to stay in myself and stay present with his dick, the more the energy was able to move within him and then it became a really beautiful relationship where like I could literally feel him like communicating to me, being like, “Hey, I want to give you energy. Come. Come suck me and I’m going to give you energy.”
Then it was like I could feel the presence of what his energy was. Sometimes he was consciously not aware, and
I would be sucking his dick, and his dick would just be giving me like crazy amounts of like light energy into my body, just opening me up.
As that happened, I became more in tune with it.
Then what would happen, too, is whenever I would have like an emotional release or something, he would get erect. He’s like, “I’m here. Like I’m here to give energy. Like I’m here.”
PRACARSH: Yeah. This was very weird to me. Like why are you getting hard when she’s crying? [Laughs]
CARLA: [Laughs] It’s like an…
PRACARSH: This is kind of weird. But then I very soon realized that no, no, no, okay, you’re stepping up. You’re like offering your services, you’re offering the gifts that you have, that you can truly bring to alchemize this.
CARLA: Yeah, yeah.
KIM: I love that. What about the other way around? Like your relationship, Pracarsh, with her yoni? Like you talked about the breasts, but how did that figure into it with her yoni?
PRACARSH: Yeah. So actually, what I realized, I mean, there was this idea in me that I have to give, and the giving is for her. I think earlier I would be like massaging her yoni or licking her and I would think it’s for her.
But as soon as I shifted that engine within me, that the giving is also for me to feel. Like I’m giving so I can feel that I’m giving and feel the joy in giving.
CARLA: Instead of it being like a performative, “I want to get you off,” kind of thing.
PRACARSH: Or not even get you off. I want to help you. I want to heal you.
CARLA: I want to help you. Yeah.
PRACARSH: Like whatever you—I think as soon as I kind of centered in myself, knowing that I just need to be there for her, she will go through her own process.
Yonis are highly intelligent and sentient
She will take her own pulse; I just have to be there and give thoroughly.
Yeah, I think that changed my relationship with how I was approaching her.
CARLA: Yeah. Literally like allowed my yoni to one, like start releasing a lot of things that it had been holding. I think like previous to our marriage, for me, I’ve been in relationships for like—sex, it was dog food sex, and my yoni remembers all of that. In the beginning was like, “No, we’re not doing that anymore. Like, bitch, stop. Like no mas.”
And so I went through my own process where like I had to also come into a relation with my yoni and the more I’ve come into my relationship with my yoni, the more it’s opened to also come into relation with him. To like feel safe because I learned that I needed to tend to myself as well because I was just—at the beginning I was kind of like, “Well, you just do it,” kind of thing. Like I was just kind of not taking responsibility for myself. And that has, as
I’ve taken more responsibility, listened more to my yoni, and taken her seriously, it’s also like opened up the space.
Because you were also there as witness for me to release all that physical tension. I mean, all those blocks, again, like we’re saying, it’s physical tension. So for him to release the physical tension slowly and also feel her energy more and more, yeah.
KIM: When you say release the physical tension, do you mean through yoni massage or what?
CARLA: Yeah, through yoni massage in particular. Through just like, yeah, I mean, mainly—
PRACARSH: Yeah. Mainly I think lately we’ve also been doing some fascial work but on the yoni because everything is connected and like—
CARLA: That’s also been very helpful.
PRACARSH: So like learning some fascial meridians and what we can do where, massaging around the yoni, doing fascial maneuvers around the yoni, that has also really helped, I think in general, to literally bring hydration to the yoni. Because something that dehydrated her.
CARLA: With attention.
KIM: Right, yeah.
PRACARSH: That’s why they’re not flowing. That’s why you know the juices are not coming. So I think doing that is also—and that has actually been quite helpful.
CARLA: Yeah.
KIM: Anything else you want to add to the relationships you have with each other’s genitals?
CARLA: I think the craziest thing for me has been realizing that our body is so energetically sentient. Like our mind is just a tiny fraction of what our body is capable of experiencing and feeling. The intelligence that exists within our genitals and within our sexual organs is crazy. Like it’s such—I think for me, with his dick, people are like—people say a lot of bad things about the genitals and stuff. There’s all these slurs.
Genital curses
KIM: Every curse word is genitalia related. It’s like, “Oh, fuck,” or “You’re a cunt,” or “You’re a pussy,” “You’re a dickhead,” “You’re a cock,” “You’re a cocksucker.” Everything is some kind of blasphemy toward the genitals.
CARLA: And it’s so sad.
KIM: Asshole! [Laughs]
CARLA: Asshole, yeah. But you can say like, “You’re a dick,” like it implies like stubborn and—no.
KIM: Or you’re the worst thing ever. It’s like, “You’re a dick!” It seems like it’s the worst thing.
CARLA: Like it’s not true at all. Like he has the most pure, gentle,
beautiful energy. That is just like—I’m like constantly just like, “Wow.”
The purity and beauty of his cock as a higher being
The devotion comes so naturally because I’m just like, “I’m in the presence of a higher being.” If my mind cannot comprehend or even come close to like the purity that this holds.
And my yoni is the same. Both of them. Even my breasts, like the amount of energy. And his balls also. Like his balls are a completely different entity to his dick. They’re connected but they have two different energies. When they’re open and when they’re flowing, they have so much to give and so much to show us about ourselves, about life, about everything.
Godly energy in our genitals
It’s just, I don’t know, to me it’s like very Godly energy, which may sound like very crazy to some people, but I really feel that when I’m in communion, I’m like I’m in the presence of something much bigger than me.
KIM: I love that. It makes me think that that has to be true because otherwise, why would there be this very deliberate distortion of those energies? Like I said, like someone came up with this idea to put all of these blasphemy, cursing, condemning words attached to all of the genitalia. Like why would someone do that if they actually—it wasn’t like a gaslighting-type psyop to help distract you from the actual truth that lays underneath that.
CARLA: Yeah. Because when we hear all of that we grow up thinking like, “Oh, ew, the genitalia is so gross, I got to stay away,” and then so much shame and so much taboo. But it’s so silly because there is so much energy there and it’s so beautiful. It’s literally like—and it’s an energy that holds you to your highest standard.
Genitals demand coherence and honesty. Otherwise they shut down.
KIM: How do you mean that? How do you mean that, that it holds you to the highest standard?
CARLA: Like what we were saying, if we’re way out of alignment with truth or intention when we approach, it’s like, “No. No. I will not accept this. I’m not accepting this. I know you’re capable of so much more than this, no.”
It’s like, yeah. And also, I think kind of one way to describe is like when I’m in communion with that energy, it almost brings more coherence. It becomes like a feedback loop because it’s like that—he’s giving me that high energy. So then all of the things that are low energy in me or that are like negativity or blocked, they have to come up to be released because my body can’t hold those two things at the same time. It’s like a contradiction, both of us.
Within the relationship of our field, within the field of our body, energetically, internally, it’s like as the energy heightens in our genitalia, like in our bodies, everything that does not match that frequency has to go. It has to be cleared.
It’s like for us, I think the way to kind of summarize it is as we come into communion more and more with this high-frequency energy that our bodies are capable of creating and holding, the more we have to level up and the more we have to grow. Then that gets translated out into like our everyday life and our perspective.
It’s funny because that then creates like more block clearing to come up because that stuff just cannot be held.
PRACARSH: Yeah. There are many stones in the river, many rocks in the river that are not moving. So when you go upstream and you move some of those rocks, literally the flowing freezes. But increasing the flow helps to move some bigger rocks that are there. Those bigger rocks move; the flow increases even more. Then you can even move like very big rocks.
So even, I think, going into this work, even as—once you start clearing blocks and more show up, it’s just—it just shows that the flow of your life has increased and it wants to get cleared of all the shit that is in the way.
We also realize that, okay, because I think there’s something that she constantly
“Oh, man, will this ever end? Is my whole life going to be just block clearing, block clearing, block clearing?”
And we’re like but feel how the intensity of the flow has changed. So it feels like we’re moving like really big things now. All the small things are out of the way. We’re moving the big stones in the river now.
CARLA: And the more we do that, the easier our life has become.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
PRACARSH: There’s less obstruction. And she was saying, “If you go to a river and there’s a big rock, usually what you’ll see is like water like looping around behind the rock, like stagnant water.” So literally having these rocks in the river stagnates your flow a little bit.
CARLA: It keeps you looping.
PRACARSH: It keeps you looping. So once you remove that, it’s like [holding both fists together and then swinging them open].
KIM: Yeah. I love that. I was thinking when you were describing the impeccability that the genitals demand, it’s like going to a temple where people talk about if you have to purify and cleanse yourself to even enter the temple and you enter the temple to gain more direct connection with God, spirit, yourself, but you even have to come to the temple cleansed and purified as much as you can before you’re allowed to go in.
CARLA: Yeah, I agree. Exactly.
PRACARSH: Yeah, yeah.
KIM: Yeah. Anything else on that topic? The whole genital communication?
PRACARSH: I think the thing that we realized is that this is all natural. Like how you eat and how you drink and how you walk and how you wake up and how you sleep. Like these are natural.
Genitals communicate. They are high-energy beings.
Sex should happen. If it’s not happening, address the blocks that are in the way. Like the problem is not on a sexual level always, it’s like—
CARLA: It’s maybe more upstream. But yeah, like this—and feeling this energy, I feel like it is something natural. We should all be able to feel it.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
CARLA: Like we’ve always been able to perceive energy and move energy and all those things. But even so, I feel like it’s just a natural part of the body. I don’t know. I have no evidence for this. This is just so much what I feel because it’s just—as we’ve been removing, this has just been what’s happened so it can’t be anything else. Like it’s the only thing that makes sense.
Consciously using pro-creative sexual energy to manifest in life
KIM: Yeah. I think that underneath, within my work, talking about the genitals being these barometers and these truth centers and channels, conduits of energy, that is the truth that’s underneath it all and people start to uncover that and that’s why I say all this energy gets liberated in them and in their lives when they do this, but there’s such a massive effort to obscure that truth and to cover over with shame and taboo and misinformation, all of these things. Yeah.
You mentioned then—so all of this truth-speaking and alignment and then that pours out into your day-to-day life.
As all your genitals, your own truth comes online, how does that manifest in your outer life? What kind of changes do you see happen?
PRACARSH: I mean, for me, Kim, I think I’ve lost all resistance.
I’m not resisting anything. I mean, I have discernment but the resistance that I was feeling towards life, towards inviting stuff in, has gone.
So then literally, like when that happens first, I think it already assimilates into the beauty of your life right now. I was holding myself in resistance with my family to some extent, with being in this place to some extent, and all those things.
Once those things dropped because the flow increased, I am also realizing how beautiful life is in this moment and how many opportunities there are literally.
I’m feeling that my soul quality is becoming clearer to me. Like what am I here for?
Which was very hard for me to articulate. Like let’s say even on the end of the salon, but clearing, like continuing to clear blocks in all of those things, have at least brought me to a point where I can speak out that okay, this is what I want.
And I think when you’re able to speak that, that this is what I want, it just finds resonance. I don’t know how it finds resonance, like maybe you know, but it just finds resonance. So what you truly want it genuinely reflected in life because we’re also in this like sexual process with life. It’s not just with each other; it’s like a metaphor for all of life. As I hold more space, I also start receiving from life.
And in various ways it has manifested as now like—
CARLA: It like completely changed our entire like career focus. Like actually like three weeks into the salon, I had like a very, shitty, NGO job that I had been like fighting with and hating for like so long. Then like things just magically happened to where I had to leave that job. It wasn’t everything that I created, it was just like—it all just kind of happened by providence. Like it all just came and then I was able to recuperate like a good amount of money from the last of it.
Then it was over and then since then it’s been like, okay,
Everything now that’s out of alignment with actually your soul, like your true energy, it’s got to go.
That was the first phase. And that was kind of amazing actually.
Then everything that is now in alignment with our soul is just like very easily, without a lot of effort, just showing up in the field.
And then you start to realize, too, like, “Okay, this is coming into my field. It’s also probably for a reason. Okay, why is this coming in?”
And you start to like cocreate with life in that way of understanding that, okay, I’m in a relationship with my—it’s all like a microcosm. I’m in a relationship with myself and my energy. I’m in a relationship with him and his energy. We’re in a relationship, like together, we’re in a relationship with life.
And as things come into the field, like not being in resistance, not like hiding, not protecting, not tensing.
PRACARSH: Not tensing, like you would tense your sex organs.
CARLA: Yeah, or like tense when like we’re having a conversation but like, “Okay, what do you have for me? What’s here? Okay. Let’s look.” That has like increased and all these crazy things like since then, we’ve completely shifted focus in terms of like our career, our jobs and everything, with no resistance and no effort and things are just coming.
PRACARSH: Things are just coming.
CARLA: Things are just coming. For example, I quit that shitty NGO job. Now we’re now managing an aspect of his family business. The amount of money that I was making at that NGO job, we’re now making more money through managing that aspect of the family business. We didn’t have to do anything for that.
PRACARSH: Working half an hour.
CARLA: Working half an hour a day. When I was working like seven hours a day, slaving away to make the same amount of money, and it just happened. It just was like, “Hey, do you want this?” And we’re like, “Um, yeah. Cool.”
But before, maybe when that would’ve happened we would’ve been like, “Oh, like do we want to—” there may have maybe been some more resistance to it for whatever reason.
Now we’re like—can just see very clearly for the opportunity that it is and not be—and us also make the choice of like, “Okay, I’m not going to be resistant to this, I’m going to take this. Thank you, life. I know you have the best interest in mind for me.
KIM: I love this parallel as we liberate the procreative energy of the genitals as these channels of life force, then we become pure conduits for that. It moves out into the world, and it begins to create.
You talk about the co-creation. Then we are consciously and even unconsciously bringing these things into our field.
The field is reflecting these inner changes and that inner alignment and that purity
We get things that show up in our space that are much more reflections of that, rather than huge gaps of disharmony, they’re very, very aligned. And even the ease, like you’re saying, now it’s like half an hour a day of something that’s easy and blissful versus seven hours of slogging it out and burdened feeling.
CARLA: Yeah. Life has definitely felt more easy. And I think it’s also, we feel more easy in ourselves, so life feels more easy.
PRACARSH: Yeah. I think it’s because of that only, because we feel easy in ourselves, we are clear about who we are, we are not holding resistance in us, we are choosing to grow, we are choosing to face the challenges with a growth mindset, and so life outside, it just feels very easy.
Even, I think the challenges that have come our way, there is much more capacity now in us to handle those challenges clearly than there was earlier just because we were constricted in all the different ways.
KIM: I wanted to touch on something else that you’d mentioned, Carla, and you talked about—because we spoke early about the genitals changing shape as a result when these blockages get cleared. You mentioned that you’d had your yoni change in texture and shape and has become more full and alive. How would you describe those shifts and anything else you want to say about that?
CARLA: Yeah, I think before the salon, like, I mean, **** [0:47:26.1] very detailed way, it kind of felt like she was dry. Like she would get wet and everything, but it was also kind of inconsistent or like not inconsistent, but it would just—it wasn’t a state of being. It was just—like it would just kind of maybe happen, maybe not happen, I had no consciousness or awareness of what was going on with her. Like there was just a disconnect.
Texturally, she felt like dry, almost like receded or something, like the walls felt very like flat and—it felt very brittle almost and very sensitive.
PRACARSH: And when I would massage it would feel like hard and almost like this [holding up hand and squeezing tense fingers].
Regular yoni massage and jade egg to unwind a “hard” and closed vagina
CARLA: Yeah, like very tense. As with regular yoni massage with the jade egg and also like listening to her more, that has softened so much. Where now it’s like, okay, now she feels like way more full. And where also, like before, I had to make an—this is actually was also a very crazy like shift, was that I had to make an effort to move energy from her. I had to like very consciously breathe or very much like tune into the energy. Like there was a lot of effort involved.
And as she softened and I can like literally feel her like be more hydrated, it just feels like more hydration, like there’s just more flow down there, like the energy just moves. Like I don’t have to think about it. I just have to be almost a bit in a thoughtless state and that’s been actually really important also to learn how to focus in that kind of a thoughtless way but not in an effort way. There’s like a very big difference. One is like forcing and the other is like, okay, I’m just going to be present, and the energy just moves.
“Vibrations of energy come from her all the way up my body and I get transported into different dimensions.”
Like different dimensions. In between reality, like I’m gone. I am feeling energy moving through my body like crazy. Colors, like I lose the edges of my body completely, and I know that that is like—that’s her energy, that’s her energy moving through.
It’s been a parallel feeling, amplified energy in my body, and feeling her physically shift and become more open and more supple. Yeah.
KIM: Is that just during sex or anytime, anyplace?
CARLA: I’m still having—it is, it’s more like outside of sex. It’s more of me cultivating—because almost when we’re in sex, it’s a little bit easier because there’s both of us witnessing. Like there’s two energies that are coming together to witness that and to move that. That has become an easier place to do that and outside of life, like in everyday life, it’s still more of like a, “Okay, let me tune in, let me feel her, what is she saying?” and building, like slowly building that relationship.
Building the relationship with my yoni has been a process of falling in love with my life, which was not the case at all like a year ago. I was not in love with my life, like I really did not.
So I’m still moving through all of the things that—all the realizations that I need to, to truly be able to like really say like,
“Oh my god, I love my body, I love myself, I love my life” and really mean it.
I’m just so excited and happy to be here. I am on that journey right now and it’s been really beautiful and it’s been a healing journey of finding tools and finding mechanisms and things to also complement that.
So yeah, outside of life, it’s been like—I feel like she’s always present now. Like she’s reflecting back to me, “Okay, you need to see this now,” “Okay, we’ve moved from this, now you got to see that now,” “Okay, now you got to bring this in,” “Now you got to like…” and that’s been my journey with myself and it’s been a journey.
Your salon initiated a really beautiful and intense journey of learning how to surrender and learning how to take what life gives me and not be in protection.
Because before this, before our marriage, I was definitely like came from a lineage of women who were like strong, independent women who so desperately wanted to be taken care of by a man. But it was like the worst of both worlds. To undue all of that in me, all of that tension that I was holding, has been my process due after the salon. Like during the salon and after the salon.
KIM: Love it.
KIM: All right, is there anything else that you guys would like to share?
Sex and meditation amplify each other
PRACARSH: I think I want to share that, I mean, meditation has really been helpful, and I mean, we are like initiated into a lineage of meditation through my mother. Here it’s like an 800-year old lineage of Himalayan meditation and it’s just like you keep your intention inside you and you let the energies come. Literally, like that’s it.
So we are realizing, and this helps us in deflecting on your work, because sometimes when we face a block in your work and we feel like, “Shit, like what to do? What to do?” we see—like because sex is a medium to flow energy. Meditation is also a medium in which energy flows. So having a couple of these mediums is very nice because then one medium can deflect onto like what you might also need in the other one.
Like my meditations happen, like when do we actually just lose ourselves and energies start flowing. So to observe all those things in us has also helped us a lot in like, okay, maybe this is the thing that we’re missing when approaching each other, like sexually.
CARLA: Yeah. Because we have discovered that like, I think when we would like initiate or being in a sex date or something, all of a sudden a lot of thoughts would come. Those thoughts would take you out of the present moment and they were almost like dissociations.
So we would do like techniques to come back to each other and then those things, which it’s very simple things, but it would still kind of happen. As we grew in our meditation practice to keep our attention—it’s like a soft focus, but it’s just a presence, that has helped sex not be so—like it helped to see actually all the places where we were dissociating from each other, and therefore, dissociating from life, and vice-versa. Like it’s been two energy modalities.
The way I see it is like meditation works up here [patting her head] and sex works down here [pointing to groin] and they’re both meeting each other and it’s both like the energy is melding.
Anyway, it’s been helpful for us to have different healing modalities and different energy modalities to kind of triangulate where we’re at whenever we hit a block, like he’s saying.
PRACARSH: Yeah. And then like, I think, and the way we find the difference also is like when—now when we’re intimate with each other, we feel the energy flowing almost naturally. Like I remember that earlier, I would visualize that, okay, energy is rising from the base of my spine, moving up to my head, separating it down. I had to almost like visualize it to circulate it kind of.
CARLA: Which I think was like the first step.
PRACARSH: Which was the first step, definitely. But now like it’s just rising. I am not even visualizing per se, it’s just rising. And I’m like, “Oh, that’s interesting, like this—” this also just happens.
CARLA: It’s also like natural once you activate those energy channels, like it just happens. It’ll just keep—and then it keeps growing, which is what’s crazy. Like you keep going and it keeps expanding and it keeps expanding. And like you say, there’s always another level to go, and there’s also another level to go with that energy expansion. It just keeps going. So that’s really exciting and really fun.
KIM: I love it. Anything else that you’d like to add to the whole conversation?
CARLA: I just want to say that being in a relationship,
Being in a conscious monogamous relationship where the container is sealed between you, has seriously been one of the most healing and beautiful experiences of my life.
I am so grateful for it every day. I’m really grateful for your work. That has given us the tools to like always make sure that our relationship is good.
“We never fight. Tension doesn’t exist for more than an hour.”
Everything is flowing so much between us and it’s not—the nice thing is, is we have the very conscious tools to create this. It’s not just like happening. Like it’s not random.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
CARLA: We’re responsible. Like we hold very conscious responsibility, radical responsibility for ourselves and our relationship to where we know that, okay, this is going to keep growing, and then just kind of keep evolving.
This isn’t going to just like randomly degrade in some weird, unknown way where we’re like, “Oh my god, I don’t even know what happened.” No. Like everything has been brought to the table. Everything is conscious. Everything is there. Nothing is behind any closed door.
That gives us a lot of confidence to move through life together and that’s been incredibly healing on every level.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
KIM: Beautiful. I’m so glad to hear it. Thank you so much for sharing all of this and giving us these beautiful insights into the language of genitals, genital-speak.
[Laughter]
CARLA: You’re the best, too.
PRACARSH: You really are.
