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Are You Speaking Your Love Languages?

I know there is a book out which talks about love languages.

That’s not what I’m referring to.

I”m talking about the deep soul code, the signifiers that let you know someone is a kindred spirit.

It’s how I’ve recognized my lovers.

They utter a phrase, they express some piece of knowledge that resonates with me in such a deep, well-f**ked way, that I am smitten.

With the Russian intellectual, it was when he talked about NLP having its roots in shamanism. I saw how he was passionately stimulated by psychology and spirituality. He filed information with great meticulousness and it all came out to nourish me in our time together.

I adored his mind. I could spend hours mindf**king him.

His other parts were awesome to f**k too.

For the YBA, it was when I saw his calves. He had glorious, sculpted calves. We were talking about how one of the Rockefellers was likely eaten when he never returned a still-wild Indonesian island/rainforest hosting cannibals.

I looked at this man’s calves and I drooled, thinking about eating him.

Later I learned how those calves cycled all over London, taking his art from gallery to gallery.

I’ve been on the road for a few months now. At times, I find the things that feed me—often in unusual places. I’ve been able to find yoga on islands with no vehicle traffic, where they import the fresh water on boats, daily. I’ve found raw, organic, vegan food in the middle of Bali.

This weekend, I connected with my spiritual community. With them, I am able to express the deepest, most philosophical and spiritually curious parts of myself.

It felt like it had been a while.

I aim to live a conscious life, but having the time and space to not only speak my language, but my dialect, with my accent to those who totally reciprocated, fed me.

I love art. I have been to art school.

I’m going to hit some art galleries this week with my friend and LA feng shui master, Dana Claudat. Dana is a Stanford-educated art historian who infuses wellness principles into her feng shui work. She’s brilliant and her art vocabulary is massive. I’m excited to explore with her.

We all have different languages and parts of ourselves which need feeding. When we nourish them, we bring these parts of ourselves alive.

We exercise them.

Which parts of you want to talk that have been mute? (Maybe it’s your genitals. I’ll be going into talking genitals very soon…) Uttering these integral words and worlds pulls these parts of yourself forward into the light. They comprise the piece of art which is you.

The more chances you have to speak them, the more fleshed out you become as a person.

Book: Brian Dettmer


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