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The Breast Medicine

Love your breasts.

I was on my six-day sex date a couple of years back.

Over the six days, my lover and I kept a constant simmer. There was plenty of sexual affection interspersed throughout the moments when we weren’t actually in bed. (We were in bed a lot).

As we got dressed for yoga, we would kiss. As I locked the door to the room, I would lightly brush his groin through his shorts. Before we stepped out onto the path, he rubbed my breasts.

In the onslaught of that intense love and constant sexual contact, I felt my breasts radiate.

I’d never felt that before: this sentience in my breasts. That my breasts were alive, and taking in information, like another sensory organ. Like my eyes. Like my fingers.


Most women are disconnected from their breasts.

It starts at puberty. When emerging breasts become the first visible sign of womanhood. Suddenly there is attention. A different kind of attention.

Men driving by in their cars slow down to look. Uncles and all sorts of peripheral male figures observe the changes.

Combine that new attention with messages about women being responsible for unwanted sexual advances, simply by, having breasts! And a female body! And most women will begin to hunch their shoulders.

They disown their breasts.

Then, there are messages about ideal breast size and shape.

There are even surgical replacements available, if you don’t think yours measure up.

Women internalize a lot of negativity around their breasts.

It’s not surprising that this dissociation actually manifests in women cutting them off. For one reason or another.


I remember sitting in the sauna with a 40-year-old friend of mine about 15 years ago. She had the loveliest, perkiest, most beautiful shaped breasts I had ever seen.

She had breastfed her son for five years.

I was thinking about all the ideas of age and breastfeeding and what they are meant to do to breasts.

She defied all of that.

Sexual activity increases breast size by 25%.


My sauna friend had been married for 20 years. She and her husband still shared a juicy, passionate, sexual connection.

You know the kind of people who make you a little uncomfortable, because their sexual attraction is so palpable? So electric that it takes over the room?

That was them.

And her breasts showed it.

Her body was taut and sleek and ripe.

From having plenty of heart-infused, I’m-taking-you-now, kind of sex.

For 20 years.


The breasts are connected to the heart. When we love and feel loved, our chest literally swells.

When we feel sexually loved, our breasts swell too.

If we are cut off from the breasts, we cut off the flow of love.

If we are cut off from the breasts, we cut off the flow of sexual energy.

There are several energy meridians which run through the breasts. The kidney meridian is one of them, and it is responsible for most of our feelings of sexual arousal.

In Taoist sexual medicine, the kidneys get the sexual “waters” flowing.

If that meridian is blocked, that will manifest as low libido. An inability to get in the flow, or to feel “juiced” up.

To reclaim your sexuality, you need to reclaim your breasts.


In the How to Be a Well-F**ked Woman salon, one of the major issues we tackle is reclaiming our relationship to disowned body parts: especially the breasts and the vagina.

I’ll give you specific techniques which range from massage to vaginal weight lifting with the jade egg, to restore that energetic harmony.

Then you can use these organs as they are meant to be used: as sensory devices. As information givers.

And sources of immense pleasure.

Oh, and you can grow your breasts. Really. With breast love, you can make your breasts get bigger.

Because don’t you know the old spiritual adage? Whatever you focus on grows. 🙂


Image: Modigliani

How to Be a Well-F**ked Woman starts next week!

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The ultimate guide to living in a female body.

Register here now.

Heart, genital and emotional intelligence in an 8-week package.

Glowing breasts, open hearts and sentient vaginas.

The most common feedback from last year’s participants:


Come and see for yourself!

Well-F**ked Woman teleseminar

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The call was yesterday.

If you’d like to listen to the replay, click here.

In the short call, I go through exactly how the salon will run and answer some common questions, like: How does it work if I’m single? Or how does it work when I’m with a partner??

Find out here!

Scroll down to the bottom and click on “Teleseminar Link.”

Image: Nicola Ranaldi

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One thought on “The Breast Medicine

  1. Wow, I just love this post and the reminder to love the skin I’m in. My breasts were a neat 34 B but dropped to an A cup after breastfeeding. I missed them and had taken them for granted.
    Over the last few years my Lover has devoured and loved them when he visits helping me to enjoy them in new ways and in-between times Ive focused attention acceptance and love. During the last 2 years Ive experienced huge swelling growth spurts in the spring ( liver Meridian ) putting me more in touch with their presence I love my boobs more than ever !.
    Kim your work and posts are amazing, deep funny honest courageous and passionate , love them !