Sacred Waters of Ejaculate Transcript
In the realm of female orgasms, one of the most sought-after, elusive, and magical quests is the phenomenon of female ejaculation. It is so mysterious that some people still debate whether it even exists, like the Loch Ness monster. So let’s put this to bed right now.
Yes, it exists. And yes, every woman can do it. If you have been following my work for any length of time, then you know of the Anami guarantee, which is: Everyone can. Every sex act and every wondrous and awe-inspiring orgasm that you have ever heard about is available to you. All you need are the right tools.
Female ejaculation has been found in texts all over the world, spanning centuries in Ancient India, China, and Africa in tribal cultures. All over the globe, this experience is nothing new. The only thing that’s new is the doubt in its existence. Just like with the jade yoni egg and vaginal strengthening, these are art forms that have been practiced since ancient times. Wild and wise vaginas have been around for a very long time. They just need a revival these days.
The symbolism of female ejaculation, or squirting, as it’s called in the vernacular, is all about the gush and flow. I spoke a few weeks back in my episode on lubrication and how these waters are all about the feminine flow—a woman’s ability to slide through life and go with the flow.
The Sanskrit word for female ejaculate is amrita, which means food of the gods and nectar, the fountain of youth.
In Tantric texts, one of the greatest gifts that a woman could bestow upon her lover was the gift of her ejaculate. So how amazing is that? [Laughs]
I’ve been saying for years that I believe all the references to the fountain of youth are actually talking about our sexual energy. It’s not some physical location with a stone sculpture and water spewing out of it. It’s our genitals with all of their waters and wisdom flowing out of them.
I’ve looked at some of these ancient texts and it’s so obvious when you have this lens. For example, I’ve seen passages talking about the serpent guarding the waters. So, now you know.
In, as I said, Tantric text, amrita is considered the ancient, sacred gift that’s mined from the depths of the woman, and this is true. For a woman to ejaculate, she needs to be deeply surrendered and full of abandon. She needs to be open.
This fluid is the physical embodiment of that energy. Yes, it’s an amazing gift, and I know plenty of women who have strived to ejaculate and just couldn’t until they let go of the reservoir that was dammed up inside of them. I will give you an example.
Karina and Molly were an incredible, beautiful couple who came to my Bali retreat some years ago. One of her big goals was squirting and to have G-spot orgasms, and she hadn’t had either yet. Those are noble goals, and very achievable ones, at least in Anami Land. One of the key pillars in the Anami philosophy is the idea of clearing space, or what I call relationship feng shui.
This means that you have a constant flow of communication between you. You talk. You express. You bring your emotions out into the open. You say what you really think and feel. This keeps the space between you clear.
If you have the kind of relationship that most people have, you don’t do this. Instead, you live by don’t ask/don’t tell and have a life of perpetual white lies or more serious lies. This becomes normal, and so, the energetic flow between you stops. It’s all blocked up with your lies, half-truths, and hiding. Not very fuckable. [Laughs] You are cockblocking each other.
But this just gets chalked up to the inevitable demise of the relationship that people have come to accept as normal. It’s not. It’s the product of this turning away.
I say all of that to wind it back to Karina and Molly and her quest to ejaculate. On the retreats, I get people to do this work of relationship feng shui. Everyone thinks it’s all champagne and blow jobs [making shushing sound] [laughs], but there’s more to it than that to cultivate gourmet sex.
People come to class, and then I send them away with home play. Some of it is sexual, and some of it is emotional.
Early in the week, I sent Karina, Molly, and everyone else away to do their deep, heart-to-heart, block-clearing home play. They came back the next day, and the topic of that day was all about female G-spots and squirting. Then everyone went back to their villas and dutifully did that home play. But Karina and Molly didn’t have much success with any of this G-spot or ejaculation stuff, and so they stepped back and returned to their unfinished business from the day before. They’d opened up these emotional conversations on that first night and hadn’t quite finished. I mean, there’s a lot of stuff for people. Obviously, the longer they’ve been together, the more there can be to clear, especially when they’re not living by what I call a clean-as-you-go policy. All of these things become dammed up and create obstruction in the space.
They stayed up until about, I think, 1:00 a.m. that night and put that stuff to bed. Then, in the morning, they tried their hand again—ha ha—at her G-spot, and she came all over the sheets, the floor, his hands, and his face. She gushed all over the place. She laughed, screamed, laughed, and gushed some more. There was a lot in there that needed to come out. So she opened up the release valve, and out it came.
Despite hours and years of trying in the past, the magic key to her rivers of ejaculate wasn’t the hand stroke—though I did give them some tips—but the fact that she cleared the way first. They got in there, elbows deep into the muck and the mire of their relationship. They sloshed through the mud, and they kept at it until they came clean.
In that purification, everything came tumbling out. All of the deep vaginal orgasms, including ejaculation, are the product of this. If you build it, they will come. If you clear it, they will come. When the couple and the vagina are open and free and undefended, all the things happen.
All right, to tell you more, I have Dina with us today as this week’s Well-F**ked All Star. She has done my salons, worked with the yoni egg, and has had experiences that include shooting ejaculate over her husband’s head.
Well-F**ked All Stars
Welcome, Dina, it is fantastic to have you here.
DINA: Oh, thank you so much, Kim. I’m so happy to be here.
KIM: Let me just set this up for everybody. I had put a post up on Instagram, as I do, that was talking about lubrication and the pillars of the Anami philosophy, which are that all women can, despite their circumstances or their age.
Someone piped up in the comments to say, “Really? Age has nothing to do with natural lubrication?” And I said, “That’s right.” Then Dina came along and said, “Nope, nada, zero, zilch. I am 57 and having all kinds of orgasms now—clitoral, G-spot with squirting of tsunamic proportion, and yes, even cervical orgasms, which are pure nirvana.”
Dina has been in my Anami salon. She’s worked with the jade yoni egg, and I wanted to have her share her journey because the whole point of these stories is to show people that despite their circumstances, or despite very common beliefs or mythology around sexuality and limiting beliefs around it, my whole purpose is to blast these things out of existence and show people what’s really possible.
Dina, I would love for you to share your story of where you were before and then how you came to be where you are now as this wonderful, Well-F**ked All Star.
DINA: Well, thank you, thank you, thank you. I don’t mean to sound like I’m blowing air up your skirt or anything, but if it wasn’t for you, Kim, I would not be where I am today because there are pathways to figuring this stuff out and working it out. The way your salons work, they’re so beautifully and brilliantly mapped out.
I just think, if you really surrender and do everything that you say, there’s no way you can’t get to these places. The biggest part of it is really about surrendering and putting ego aside and not telling yourself that you know everything.
Really surrender, even to the things that are very uncomfortable. Yes, you can get there, and at 57, I’m having crazy sex. I’m living a completely different life now than I was maybe four to six months ago.
KIM: That’s amazing to hear. You’re prefacing this with the idea of simply having an open mind. That’s where I usually start with people, educating them about what’s possible. People buy into a certain narrative, and a really big one for women is around age. Things connected to so-called menopause, like libido, orgasm ability, and lubrication. Lubrication is a really, really big one for “women of a certain age.”
DINA: Yeah, it was for me.
KIM: That myth is really perpetuated by the allopathic medical profession, which stands to gain financially from women buying into that story.
You were someone, it sounds like, who believed that narrative and then somehow [laughs] perhaps trusted or dared to believe that there might be another truth, and then gave yourself over to the suggestions that we go through in the different salons and came out the other side.
Tell us a bit about that journey for you.
DINA: I’m going to start with my upbringing. I was raised by an Italian, Catholic, very overbearing mother. A lot of mental, spiritual, physical abuse. There was a lot of rage in my house with both of my parents.
There was a lot of messaging. Especially with Italian Catholics, good girls don’t. You’re not supposed to enjoy sex. You only do it to please your husband, that kind of stuff. Other messaging was sex is bad. Save it for the one you love. That kind of very bipolar messaging.
I grew up with all of these very bad ideas about sex, and I have my first memory of sexual abuse at the age of four.
These things very much affected me and my outlook in life and how I was raised. I see how it affected me throughout my life with every single relationship I ever had, the hurt and the pain these things caused me. Because I had never been able to get to the root problem of what was going on. Even though I had therapy in the past and it was very good for me, we never really got to the deep, deep depths we do with this kind of work.
I will say this: yes, it is a lot faster than traditional therapy, but buckle up, because it can get hairy.
KIM: When you say “this,” do you mean this deliberate, conscious, sexual self-examination?
DINA: Yes.
KIM: Diving into our sexual selves, our potential, and the demons that lurk there, yeah, rather than more traditional talking therapy.
DINA: Right, exactly. I had a lot of abuse from my mother, so there was a lot of stuff about womanly stuff. I got mixed messages about how women were supposed to be and even how men were supposed to be. Eventually, I got married, and I never enjoyed sex. It was something that I just did, sometimes as manipulation to get what I wanted or as what I thought I was supposed to do.
And I couldn’t understand because everybody else seemed to really love sex and I didn’t get it at all. Because it was not fun for me.
When I got married, I had to be drunk in order to have sex because I couldn’t handle what was happening with my body. I couldn’t be in my body emotionally and be present with what was happening to me. I had to check out just to get through it.
KIM: I’ll just say that’s very common for people who’ve had a past of sexual abuse that hasn’t been resolved or healed. They need to use substances to have sex, or the body puts up blocks against having sex. They might have constant yeast infections or the whole range of issues that I term loosely as “vulvabullshitia,” which is when the allopathic profession can’t pinpoint what it is or how to help it, and they just give it some random name. With, for example, vagina on lockdown, a woman’s vagina is tightly shut and feels like it won’t open or has severe pain with intercourse. These are all messages from the body that are saying, “I’m not opening up until you heal and examine what’s here.”
Your version of that, needing to be disassociated through substances and alcohol, fits that same story.
DINA: Yes. There were times I would vomit. I would vomit, okay? And it was then I said, “This is not right. Because why does everybody seem to love sex but I’m vomiting and have to be drunk?” I got to a point where I said, “Maybe I should look at this.” And it was actually a next-door neighbor of mine who said to me, “Dina, why don’t you go to therapy?” I said, “I can’t go to therapy. That’s for people with problems.”
KIM: Right! [Laughs]
DINA: Because that’s what you think. I mean, you just think these are the weirdest people and that people with real problems go to therapy.
She said, “Do you know what therapy is?” And I said, “Well, no.” And she said, “All you’re doing is sitting with someone and talking. All you do is talk.” And I said, “Oh! I can do that.” I went to therapy, and I found this gal who was very in her feminine and helped me a lot. She was the one who helped me get to the point where I could have clitoral orgasms. I felt like Jasmine from Aladdin. Suddenly it was a whole new world. I was flying around on a carpet. [Laughs] And this was awesome because I wasn’t throwing up anymore or having to be drunk all the time.
But at the same time, it still wasn’t fabulous. It still wasn’t great. I still wasn’t completely engaged in the act. I still was somewhat dissociated and distancing. I never could completely give myself over to someone. I could never completely say, “Here I am in all of my glory.” There were walls and all kinds of blocks up.
When I heard you speak about healing yourself through sex, as much as it absolutely blew my mind that you would turn toward the thing that you’re running from and embrace it, at the same time, I said, “Oh my God, this makes so much sense. Of course. Of course.”
Sacred Waters of Ejaculate Tip:
So I got your jade yoni egg, and I bought the Luscious Elixirs and started working on that.
KIM: I did an interview yesterday, and I said people might think that my favorite thing about sex is the pleasure, bliss, and ecstasy.
DINA: No.
KIM: Actually, it’s the orgasmic enlightenment. It’s the self-actualization. It’s the transformation and altering and—
DINA: It’s the gift that keeps on giving.
KIM: Right!
It’s the expansion of my state of consciousness. That’s my favorite thing about sex, or at least the way that I have sex and the way that I aim to show others how to have sex, which is this way of expanding, opening, and deepening our state of consciousness.
Sure, there’s a lot of ecstasy and bliss that goes along with that, no doubt, but for me, that’s not the primary objective. The primary objective is really these deeper experiences and awarenesses in the sense that I’m being changed and bettered as a person.
DINA: Yes, yes.
KIM: That’s, to me, the real juice.
Is there anything else you wanted to finish off with on that?
DINA: Yes. When I had my first cervical orgasm, I had this wave—it was like a tsunami—of energy from this emotion that came over me. Then I had another wave that literally pushed my body forward. Literally, my body came up and forward, and then I rolled to my side and started crying. I started sobbing for about 20 minutes, my husband said.
When all was said and done, this is where it gets crazy: I got up to go use the restroom and clean myself up, and I turned around, and the bedroom and my husband had shrunk down very, very small. He looked like he was three inches tall in the bed. The bed looked six inches wide. I felt like this huge, 12-foot being stuck in this room.
I don’t mean that it was crowded and uncomfortable. No. I felt like fucking Wonder Woman with my hands on my hips and a cape blowing in the wind.
KIM: Amazing.
DINA: I felt huge in the most brilliant way. Like there wasn’t anything I couldn’t do, kind of a thing. But what was bizarre was how small everything else looked and how big and bright. It was very strange.
KIM: I love hearing these things because I’m forever talking about the power that is between our legs and literally at our fingertips. There is this concerted, deliberate effort to remove people from this notion that they actually have this power. We see this energy and theme perpetuated throughout allopathic medicine and our culture in general, that you don’t have the power, somebody else does. You can’t heal yourself; somebody else or something else has to heal you.
Sacred Waters of Ejaculate Tip:
KIM: My belief—and I talked about this in my Censorship of Sex podcast episode—is that the censorship is a very deliberate distortion of what the energy of sex really is and can do. The things that you’re describing are amazing examples of this interdimensional power, and really, that’s what sex is. It’s the bridge between the doorway between life and death. Between other dimensions that we have access to when we consciously are able to access this power and these portals.
DINA: We’re just trying to get in touch with our body and feel our body and get to know ourselves and start doing that kind of deep reconnaissance work. Like you say, “Get in there with your fingers and start learning your vagina.” Some of these things, when I heard you say them—I mean, of course I’d had my fingers in my vagina, but not that deep—I thought, “Well, why didn’t I?” After I heard you say it, I thought, “Duh.” But it would’ve never occurred to me to do that.
Sacred Waters of Ejaculate Tip:
So I started doing that work, started self-pleasuring. You wanted us to stop using the vibrator and the clit and all that kind of stuff. I tell my husband, when I go to masturbate now, that I’m going to church. I’ll say, “I’m going to church,” and he’ll say, “Okay.” Because that’s where I go pray at the altar of my vagina now.
KIM: Beautiful!
DINA: Now I’m still having G-spot orgasms with my husband, and I’m doing it with massive ejaculation. We’re talking shooting over his head, going way past the bed, that kind of stuff. Because it’s like oxygen for me now.
There was another time when I wasn’t able to masturbate for three weeks and it finally hit me, “Oh my God, you haven’t masturbated.” I finally did my thing, and I had such a massive G-spot orgasm, I should’ve had plastic on all the walls; it was like that. But I felt like I had a full-body chiropractic adjustment after that. Now I have these massive orgasms with this massive squirting.
And I’m telling you, from absolute start to absolute finish, it’s about ten minutes. I can do it in about ten minutes.
KIM: That’s fantastic. Do you see any kind of parallel between the ejaculate and your outer life? I often liken ejaculate and female fluids to a sense of flow in our outer lives. Is there anything you would say about that?
DINA: There’s something I want to say too about this: the spiritual mysteries of the body, you know your tears and emotions are coded. I believe that even ejaculate is coded. When ejaculate comes up, it’s coded with things that tell stories of what’s happened to us, what we’re releasing, what we’re letting go, and even the beautiful things that are coming out.
Kim, before all this, I would cry every day. Every day. Not a little bit of crying. Every day, crying, crying, crying. I don’t cry every day anymore at all. So my body is having release with the ejaculate, and I feel like the more I have these orgasms and ejaculate, the more it puts me in the flow of life. It’s like you start to understand and see that there’s hope and you can let go; you don’t have the worry of “how am I going to control this?” or “I’m so scared of that.” You just kind of let go, everything is free and easy, and things start to come to you. Oh, things start coming to you massively.
KIM: Tell me about that.
DINA: As messed up as I was emotionally and completely shut off and detached from life in every way, the more I do this work, with every orgasm and every time I journal and tap and do all these things and get to know myself, I work through this stuff a little bit more.
From the time I was 15, I started getting premonitions, up until my thirties, and then I stopped having them. I’m sure you can guess why, because when you’re closed off and having a lot of bad things happen, you don’t get messages anymore.
You know how when you talk to the universe or think about one thing and then the next day, there’s the answer? All of that stuff is coming to me. It’s like I’m on this information superhighway. I mean, I barely will have a thought about something, and I’m not kidding you, the answer will come to me. Boom—here you go. Just like that—here you go.
KIM: Connected. Open.
DINA: Connected. Very connected. Very open. That’s been very, very exciting. Just really letting go and surrendering to life. It’s like the more you have these deep vaginal orgasms, the more you can surrender to life and let more in.
Sacred Waters of Ejaculate Tip:
KIM: Yeah, exactly. The journey to getting there. That level of surrender and opening and trust is required to get there. The price of admission for these orgasms is a level of courage that then carries into our outer life. Absolutely.
DINA: And at 56, I just never thought that my body could ever work like that. Ever. Never. No way. To have these things going on and then at 57 to be having these major, massive orgasms—it’s very, very exciting.
KIM: What role do you think that the yoni egg practice played in your process?
DINA: I think the jade yoni egg is huge. I believe that the yoni egg talks to the cervix, because I had an experience with the jade egg where my husband slipped it into my vagina one day, and I looked at him and said, “Bill,” and I was crying. I said, “I don’t know what just happened. That jade egg just touched my cervix. I’m bawling.”
KIM: Wow.
DINA: I didn’t have an orgasm or anything, but it was like the energy. I mean, there’s just so much that happens with it, but the yoni egg gives your vagina the strength to do the work and figure it out in a way. It’s the pendulum of energy. I don’t know how to say it.
KIM: Catalyst.
DINA: It’s the catalyst.
KIM: Yeah. Activates.
DINA: That’s the word. Activates. Yes. Brilliant. The jade yoni egg is your best friend.
KIM: I agree. Rather than lube being the girl’s best friend, the jade egg is.
DINA: Yes. Yes. Yeah.
KIM: I love the stories of your absolutely prolific and tsunamic ejaculate. What advice would you give people, especially if they’re at a certain age where they’re told that these things are elusive or maybe even impossible for them? What would you say to them?
DINA: I would say, first of all, don’t believe it because it’s bullshit lies, and you’ve got to fight for your life. Fight for your happiness. No mud, no lotus. No mud, no lotus. You’ve got to get close. Your blocks are your best friends. That was the other biggest thing for me: don’t be afraid of your blocks. Hold your nose, take a deep breath, and go swim in your mud. Because to come out the other side, you have to get mud all over you and wrap your arms around it. That’s how you get there. That’s how you have these orgasms. That’s how you have the ejaculate that goes with it and all these amazing moments where you’re seeing and touching the face of God and hearing music. I mean, it’s insane.
KIM: That’s so beautiful, and I love that analogy of the mud because, from a therapeutic perspective, when we put mud on the skin or clay, it’s acting to draw out toxins. And it will leave us in a cleansed, purified, restored state.
DINA: Absolutely. So don’t run from your blocks. Even though, I will tell you, it can be scary, hang on and stay the course. You’ve got to fight for your life. You’ve got to fight for your happiness. If you had told me to stand on my head and spit nickels, I would’ve done it.
KIM: You were willing to try anything.
DINA: Yes. That’s where I was. I had hit rock bottom. And as hard as this work can be at times, at the same time, it’s just so much fun too. I mean that. [Laughs]
KIM: I think it’s fun, yeah. I think it’s great fun.
DINA: And very, very, very rewarding. You get to learn things about yourself that you just never knew.
KIM: Beautiful. Anything else that you’d like to add?
DINA: You can do it! It’s there.
KIM: Yes. Anyone can. That’s the Anami guarantee. Anyone can at any stage of their lives. Anyone can.
DINA: Yes, yes.
KIM: Fantastic. Thank you so much, Dina.
DINA: You’re welcome. Thank you, Kim.
You can learn about all things squirting and vaginal power in my Vaginal Kung Fu Salon. This is your ultimate guide to vaginal mastery to fully own and inhabit your sexual power. To check out the free preview video series and to be notified of when we open the doors for registration, go to Vaginal Kung Fu.
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