Talking Heads: When Genitals Speak, We Listen – Transcript
Something I saw early on in my work, is that our genitals reflect the truth of who we are.
And sexually, they do this moment to moment.
If a woman isn’t wet, she’s not ready or turned on enough.
If a man isn’t hard, he’s not present and fully occupying his cock.
In the allopathic view, these indications are totally irrelevant.
Meaning, they attribute NO symbolic messages to dry vaginas or softcocks.
And they encourage people to ignore and override anything their genitals have to say.
And in Anami Land, we attribute ALL meaning to these things.
As in, our genitals are oracles.
And when they speak, they reveal our innermost truths.
Not only is a dry vagina not aroused.
It’s also showing a woman who is out of touch with her feminine flow.
She is dry, stuck and immobile. Inflexible.
Lifeless, like a tumbleweed drifting through the desert.
If a man struggles with getting solid erections, not only is he disconnected from the full power of his sexuality, but the full power of his masculinity.
He doesn’t OCCUPY it. And thus he doesn’t occupy his cock either.
When a woman is in her full salaciousness, connecting to her sensual energy, basking in her feminine light, she GUSHES.
Her yoni is supple and responsive.
Ripe, sensitive with exquisite feeling.
Lubricating naturally, just from the sound of her lovers voice.
From seeing him look at her from across the room.
From imagining him touching her.
Panties soaked. Right then and there.
THAT is a healthy, pussy.
Our genitals are barometers.
They show us the EXACT climate we are experiencing here and now, and in this stage of our lives.
An inhabited cock is solid. Unflappable.
Like the man.
An extension of the man.
When a man is fully inhabiting his masculine energy, he fully inhabits his erections.
Wild. Proud. BURSTING at the seams.
He stands firm in his convictions.
He’ll stand up to anyone, anywhere, anytime.
He’s pulsing with masculine, raw power and strength.
He doesn’t get bowled over and cave with the slightest provocation.
And sexually, he doesn’t just come because he got a glimpse of her ass in that certain position and he just couldn’t contain himself.
Nah.
Weak man. Weak cock.
Instead, he can go the distance. As long as it takes.
As far as it takes.
To win.
***
When a man or woman is especially stuck, the energy flow inverts even more.
To the extent that they begin to SEE these blockages.
Stuck or clogged sexual energy manifests as some kind of ailment in the reproductive organs.
Ranging from endometriosis to difficult periods and menopause, to cysts and growths in women.
And in men, PE or ED or prostate issues.
****
This is why I’ve always railed against the use of these false stimulants.
No Viagra. No lube. No hormones.
Not necessary.
Because your genitals are messengers.
They are the barometers of your truth.
You can choose to listen to what they have to say and open up that channel of communication.
Or you can shut it down.
You can heal and bridge whatever gap of dissociation or injury has been built up over the years.
Or you can slather on the lube, guzzle the Viagra, assume that your body be dumb dumb, and by so doing, you FURTHER reinforce that gap between YOUR deeper truth and your body’s expression of it.
The foundation of my work assumes that our bodies are
- Infinitely wise
- They tell the truth
- And they are our allies. Not our adversaries.
IF the trust between you and your body has been ruptured over time, you can repair it.
If you’ve had a series of experiences and are living in a place of chronic stress and un-integrated trauma, this is the product of never healing and alchemizing anything from your past that’s created the rupture.
One of the most powerful ways to awaken your genitals, bring them online and have them function as these divine messengers is through yoni and lingam massage.
This goes far beyond “hand jobs” in that the intention is totally different.
The aim here is to de-numb, awaken, activate and heal.
You can do these massages on yourself.
But the best is to perform them on each other.
Through your loving touch and your focused attention, you bring out the impurities, the suppressed and they’re illuminated and integrated.
Catalyzed by your emotional and sexual connection.
These are amazing to do with each other on your sex dates.
Great as foreplay, but also AS a stand alone sex date.
Your genitals are the essence of who you are.
Most people are totally cut off and numbed out from them.
And you can help each other to reconnect and wildly increase your sexual pleasure, and heal whatever suppressed issues you’ve lodged there, liberating them.
**
I’ve spoken before about how I have separate relationships with cocks.
Meaning, I’m in love with the man.
And I’m also in love with his cock, as a distinct entity.
There’s three of us in the relationship.
The only threesome I’d ever recommend.
Well, actually there’s four or five or six of us, counting my yoni and breasts.
These parts of us become so alive, so animated, that we communicate with them and develop a language and relationship that is its own thing.
Our Well-F**ked All Star couple in today’s episode, Carla and Pracarsh, are going to tell you all about their experiences in doing this.
They found my work early on in their relationship and applied Anami principles devotedly.
You could say they have an Anami marriage.
They’ve gone deeper into these things than I’ve seen a LOT of people do.
And the insights they’ve gained through it all are mind and body-blowing.
One of the major themes in our conversation is talking about the relationships they have with their own and each other’s genitals.
They’ve become so intimate with each other’s genitals as truth-telling, multi-dimensional portals.
We talk about all of this today.
We also have a solo episode with Pracarsh where he unpacks the entire journey with his cock waking up.
Which includes healing circumcision trauma and massively growing his cock.
That one is called: “My Dick Grew So Big!”
Which is Season 7, Episode 26.
Well-F**ked All Stars Carla and Pracarsh
KIM: Welcome. It’s such a pleasure to have you both.
CARLA: Good to see you, Kim. Thanks for having us.
PRACARSH: Good to see you, Kim. Thank you.
KIM: Amazing. So you guys have done Coming Together, and you’ve had some epic, epic breakthroughs and transformations. We’ve already spoken with Pracarsh before and had some amazing insights into his growth in all ways [laughs], and we’d love to hear from the two of you.
And by that, the double-meaning there is 100% accurate—some incredible cock growth.
But let’s talk about the two of you together and your relationship and what shifts you’ve seen by going through all these processes.
CARLA: Yeah. It’s definitely been a crazy healing journey and a journey of not just coming together, but coming back to ourselves, so that we can actually come together. So that all of the stuff that was very unconscious between us could be addressed.
An Anami-inspired marriage
We got married, and about six or seven months later, we did the salon. It really started our marriage with the Anami philosophy. It was interesting because before we started the salon, we had intimations about a lot of the things that we were going to work through in the salon. We had already found your work, and we were already applying a lot of things, and naturally, we were going through our own process, but it was very chaotic, and we didn’t really have a sense of direction, even though things were moving.
Grow or die: demon hunting for the win
CARLA: Yeah. Because what happens is, of course, you have the so-called honeymoon phase. You begin a relationship, and it’s all bliss, beautiful, all love, and then there comes a point where all the demons start showing up suddenly.
KIM: [Laughs] Yes.
CARLA: All of a sudden, you’re thinking, “Wait.” That was the phase that we were in right when we started the salon. “Oh, okay, wait. All of my patterns are coming out. All of your patterns are coming out. And what is this?” We both had a sense that we had to be responsible for our own traumas and patterns. We had to take responsibility for ourselves.
But I think we learned in this process how beautiful a healing opportunity it is when those demons come out.
PRACARSH: That is something I think that also really solidified for us in doing Coming Together, that actually, facing your demons is an aspect of beauty. It’s not something to turn away from; it’s something to welcome. Because your life is essentially saying, “Let’s see, when you fell in love, I gave you this very beautiful honeymoon-like experience. Do you want to continue this? Yes? Then please clear all this.”
Initially, in a relationship, you get a glimpse of how good it can actually be, the whole relationship, starting, middle, and end. Then you have to clear some stuff along the way.
KIM: Right. I think that’s where people get lost; these things start to come up and they think there’s something wrong with the relationship, or they buy into this story that the honeymoon phase is just over—there’s this whole narrative in “science” that it’s nature’s way of tricking us to get us to come together to reproduce and then, “Ha-ha, joke’s on you, bitch.” Everything is terrible after that, and you just have to grit your way through it.
I’ve always said it doesn’t make sense, and if you have an agreement as a couple to grow together and use the relationship, the power of your love for each other and your connection, to illuminate and alchemize these wounds and issues, you grow even stronger, you grow closer together, you evolve as people, and your relationship deepens.
All of these things happen if we’re willing to look at these as moments of opportunity instead of something to just run and hide from.
CARLA: Yeah, exactly.
PRACARSH: Exactly. I think she felt that she could not trust life.
CARLA: It’s interesting because I could’ve moved through all these blocks on my own; that’s work that I could’ve done for sure by myself, and the moment was right. But doing it together, you get into the nitty-gritty of all the ways that you’re resisting life or the natural flow of yourself and your energy and the energy of life in a very pointed way.
Honestly, in the moment, it can feel very difficult and tense. But I think with a lot of the tools that you’ve taught us, and through our commitment to each other and to our relationship and to growth, we maintain in those moments of difficulty the perspective that we’re here to grow. There’s a higher reason why we’re together. We’re not just here to live out some weird, programmed fantasy of some relationship. We’re here to actually create a life together in alignment with God or energy or the universe, and the universe within us.
All those things kept us really grounded as we moved through all of this.
KIM: I love it. A lot of the tenets of the Anami philosophy are about radical honesty and sharing—bringing everything to the table and to the bed. Was that difficult for you at first? Or was that something you already did? Were you challenged to do it more?
PRACARSH: I think we were challenged to do it more.
CARLA: Yeah.
How honest is radically honest?
PRACARSH: Definitely. Because with radical honesty, we thought that we were honest. “I am honest to you; you are honest to me,” and in some sense, yes, we were.
But then, when you notice all these patterns and these subtle places where you hide, that voice in you says, “Don’t tell your wife,” or “It’s not important to tell it to her.”
Actually, you have to double down on those places and in those moments. “Okay, this feels very uncomfortable for me. This feels like I don’t know how you receive this, but I’m telling you.” Remembering that we are on a journey of growth. That, actually, our bond is unbreakable. Fundamentally, it’s unbreakable. So once we remember that—
KIM: Why do you think it’s unbreakable? I mean, people might not agree with that idea. Why do you think your bond is unbreakable?
CARLA: We programmed our beliefs into us. So we get to choose how we want to experience. Sometimes you think, “Oh my god, I’m going to admit this incredibly shameful thing to you. I have to tell you, and I have no idea what’s going to happen on the other end of this. This could break the relationship.”
And so we developed a faith that, okay, honesty can never break our relationship like that. If we’re meant to go our separate ways, that’s a very different thing. That’s like us coming to an agreement where there’s honesty in that process. Sometimes the highest form of relationship you can have with someone is being away from them. Leaving the relationship, for example.
But you still have that soul-level connection with that person, and that connection still exists, and you learn so much more after you break up or something, like from previous breakups. I learned more about myself and my relationship with my partner post-breakup than I did during the actual relationship sometimes. That connection was still there.
Only dishonesty can break the relationship
For us, our bond in that sense is unbreakable because only we can break it. Only our dishonesty, our blocks, and our resistance to each other can break it. Otherwise, it’s stable and good.
KIM: Your dishonesty—let me repeat this—is the only thing that can break that bond?
CARLA: Exactly, yeah.
PRACARSH: Truly. Because your honesty is always putting you exactly where you have to be. If, after that honesty, you’re meant to stay, you’ll stay. If, after that honesty, you’re meant to leave, you’ll leave.
But at least you’ll be fucking honest, finally. At least you will know that “Okay, this is where I’m at. This is an accurate temperature reading of where I am.”
But lying is just—
CARLA: It’s really weird, and the process of radical honesty for us in particular has been the total initiation. Like you said,
Dishonesty distorts reality
We thought we were being honest with each other, and we were. We were being sincere, but we were still, in those little places, hiding or telling, not white lies, but maybe not fully admitting.
And we saw in real time how even doing that creates this distortion in reality because you don’t know where that person is actually standing, whether they’re performing something that they think you should hear, or whether whatever it is that they’re saying is real. So when you’re both fully radically honest, even if it’s very vulnerable, the energy between you stays so clear, and that’s like your metaphor of clearing the glass. That’s literally it. The energy is not distorted.
So you’re able to exit the relationship if you need to. Where, if you need to make a different decision, you and yourself are clear about taking that next step for yourself, or whatever it is. Yeah.
KIM: I was thinking that there are two reasons why people lie. One is that it will make me look very bad. I might not feel good about the way something makes me look. The second would be that I’m afraid of hurting you. I’m afraid of saying something that you’re going to feel offended and hurt by. I think those are the only two real reasons why we wouldn’t be honest.
PRACARSH: Yes. I think I would even go as far as to say that there is only one reason, the first one. Because we’re thinking about how we will look. I noticed this in me. Whenever I’m thinking or doing something to not hurt you, I’m actually doing something to not hurt me or an image of me or a projection of me.
Hiding from ourselves and each other
I think, through your salon, we’ve also learned not to hide from ourselves. Because I think before the salon, we would also feel massive energy, because we’ve always been like that. But I think parts of us were really hiding.
CARLA: There was a lot of constriction. The space between our relationship felt clear as we moved through the salon, and there were a lot of blocks to clear between us. But actually, most of the blocks, or most of the things that we had to clear, were with ourselves internally. We have things that we have brought to the relationship.
KIM: Is there any example you feel comfortable giving?
CARLA: Yeah. A few things. One of the main things that radically changed for me was my whole idea of sex. I thought that sex was what you call junk-food sex, just getting off. I knew that there was something more. I didn’t know exactly what, but I thought, “This doesn’t feel right.”
But we’re so programmed through so many different mediums to believe that we have to do sex in a certain way, and my body held on to all of that and also a lot of past traumas and different things.
I remember in the first months of our marriage, I had a lot of tension in my breasts. He would massage my breasts, and I would be crying from the pain of how much was stored in them.
PRACARSH: But before crying, she would break into hysterical laughter. I would be gently rubbing her nipples, and she would break into hysterical laughter.
CARLA: It was so funny; I thought I was possessed. I wondered, “What is happening?” Like the worst tickle attack ever, but just laughter. But then the laughter would start, and there was a moment when it would break, and I would just break down crying.
There was so much tension and block around my heart of past traumas, feeling unloved or especially feeling like I had to be overly responsible for myself or be the strong, independent woman, and that actually had created a lot of little calcification around my breasts.
There were also some past-life things that I didn’t ever fully understand. But I would get intimations of them in the emotional release.
Then, as we kept doing that consistently, they completely changed. They are so sentient now. Sometimes I’ll still break out into hysterical laughter, but that drop won’t happen as intensely. It’ll just move on to something else. I can feel the energy moving through my body now. There was a physical block, an emotional block, a spiritual block, and an energetic block that existed in them that needed attention. That wasn’t because of our relationship; I had brought that from my past into the relationship. That was the constriction that I was holding. It had nothing to do with him.
KIM: Right. And the beauty of that is then collectively, together, you’re working on integrating, alchemizing, upleveling that.
CARLA: Yeah, exactly.
PRACARSH: Yeah. One of the barometers through which we also see a difference in how we’re shifted is the very physical aspect. Physically, her breasts have changed.
Our genitals change size and shape as we release any stuck energy in them
CARLA: Physically, his dick has changed. It’s crazy.
PRACARSH: These are very tangible differences that we see in our own bodies.
CARLA: As we release this energy.
PRACARSH: As we release energy, yeah.
KIM: Yeah.
CARLA: As well as the blocks. It’s really crazy.
Blocks malform your body
PRACARSH: An emotional block, a limiting block, literally malforms you, and your body compensates around that and gets a weird shape because the body is also trying to support you.
KIM: Very well said. I love that idea. I speak about the holograph of the body all the time, and I love being able to hear people share experiences that show exactly that. As they’re using the healing and loving and procreative, sexual energy, they’re liberating that, mobilizing it, creating a physical, tangible, objectively measurable shift in the body. And especially any of the sexual organs.
CARLA: Yeah.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
KIM: We have spoken about this before in another episode, but given that you’ve just mentioned it and we’re talking already about these presentations and shifts, we’d love to hear about the cock rebirth for you, Pracarsh.
PRACARSH: Yeah, sure.
CARLA: He’s actually grown even more since we last spoke to you.
KIM: [Laughs]
CARLA: It’s been crazy. [Laughs] We literally couldn’t believe it when it happened.
PRACARSH: Yeah, yeah. It’s actually funny, after doing your course, how many things just seem second nature now. You do something, and then you just get normalized there.
CARLA: And it usually integrates with you.
PRACARSH: So normal life, yeah, this is just how it’s supposed to be. It’s taken me a moment to recall it, but I think that before the salon, one of the real challenges I was facing was holding a lot of stress in my body, and my masculine was very weak. Not because I was trying to be feminine; I was not. But it had somehow not found the activation.
And I remember in the salon, that’s also the first time I talked to you. It was, I think, the polarity week. That sparked something in me. I said, “Whoa, okay, there is something for me here.”
Why am I not doing this? And I think once I started stepping into my masculine, my dick responded. It was also true that he needed her tending to him, gently massaging him, energetically moving things through him, putting intention, giving him love.
And so, as a combination of both of those things, me stepping into my masculine, and her pouring so much love into him, he’s literally grown. He grew through the salon and afterward too. He’s just—
CARLA: Kept growing.
We randomly checked in and said, “Wait, how is this bigger?” [Laughs] But I think he isn’t compressed energetically anymore. It was literally just compression.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
CARLA: And all of a sudden, when there’s the permission and the energy flow starts again, and there’s that love and attending, it blooms. It just comes back into what its fullness is supposed to be.
PRACARSH: It feels safe. When you feel safe, you relax, your breath normalizes, and people feel like you start opening. So I think that happened to my dick and also to my body.
CARLA: And to our life.
PRACARSH: And to our life. It’s like every layer since doing the salon has been like a flower unfolding, and all those layers are showing up in our lives. It’s been like that. Like us, learning to speak through it.
CARLA: That’s one layer opening.
PRACARSH: That’s one layer opening.
CARLA: Being vulnerable, another layer opening, and so on.
KIM: Let’s back up a little bit. I want to hear more about bringing that out into your life, but I know that Carla, part of that journey with the cock growth and recognition, was literally in your hands in terms of the lingam massages and the connection that you’re having. So, from your perspective, I’d love to hear some of that story and about the relationship that grew directly with his cock.
She has conversations with his cock
CARLA: Yeah. I have my own relationship with his cock. We talk. We have conversations that sometimes he’s not even aware of because at the beginning his cock said, “I can’t trust this guy, and so I’m going to tell you these things to do,” which is really funny. We were having our own relationship.
When we started doing the lingam massage at the beginning, there was a lot of tension, and the tension was also emotional, like restriction. There was a circumcision scar and other things like that.
Just going in without a lot of expectation or anything, but just a lot of devotion. Going in and saying, “I’m here. I’m here. You just do what you need to do. I’m here to just move the energy.” And eventually, what would happen was his dick would start directing me as to how to move the energy.
Something that was really important for me to realize in that process was that sexual pleasure is a byproduct of all this clearing. It’s not the focus, which used to be the programming that I had: “I have to make sure that this person feels pleasure.” And when that would happen, I’d hit a wall, and his dick would say, “No, we’re done. That’s not going to fly anymore.”
KIM: Your genitals also become the barometers of truth. Unless you’re in that high frequency of radical, pure honesty, they don’t respond as well or even shut down.
CARLA: Yeah, they shut down.
PRACARSH: That’s what was happening to us the whole salon, whenever we would be misaligned.
CARLA: They know. “You guys made an agreement, a commitment, and we’re holding you all accountable. We’re not going to work. We’re not going to function like this.”
I had to learn how to be fully in myself. I didn’t care what he was feeling. He could be crying, feeling pleasure, whatever, but I had to be fully in myself to feel where the energy needed to go and how the energy needed to move. As that happened, the energy literally just kept going. The more I was able to stay in myself and stay present with his dick, the more the energy was able to move within him, and then it became a really beautiful relationship where I could literally feel him communicating, “Hey, I want to give you energy. Come. Come suck me, and I’m going to give you energy.”
Then it was like I could feel the presence of his energy. Sometimes he was consciously not aware, and I would be sucking his dick, and his dick would just be giving me crazy amounts of light energy into my body, just opening me up. As that happened, I became more in tune with it.
Then what would happen, too, is whenever I would have an emotional release or something, he would get erect. He was saying, “I’m here to give energy.”
PRACARSH: Yeah. This was very weird to me. Why are you getting hard when she’s crying? [Laughs] But then I very soon realized that no, no, no, okay, you’re stepping up. You’re offering your services and the gifts that you can truly bring to alchemize this.
CARLA: Yeah, yeah.
KIM: I love that. What about the other way around? Like your relationship, Pracarsh, with her yoni? You talked about the breasts, but how did that figure into it with her yoni?
PRACARSH: Yeah. There was this idea in me that I had to give, and that the giving was for her. I think earlier I would be massaging her yoni or licking her, and I would think it was for her.
But as soon as I shifted that engine, I realized the giving is also for me. I’m giving so I can feel that I’m giving and feel the joy in giving.
CARLA: Instead of it being a performative, “I want to get you off,” kind of thing.
PRACARSH: Or not even get you off. I want to help you. I want to heal you.
CARLA: I want to help you. Yeah.
PRACARSH: I think as soon as I am centered in myself, knowing that I just need to be there for her, she will go through her own process.
Her yoni is a highly intelligent, sentient being. She will take her own pulse; I just have to be there and give thoroughly.
Yeah, I think that changed my relationship with how I was approaching her.
CARLA: Yeah. It allowed my yoni to start releasing a lot of things that it had been holding. Prior to our marriage, I’d been in relationships that had dog-food sex, and my yoni remembers all of that. In the beginning, she said, “No, we’re not doing that anymore. Bitch, stop. No mas.” And so I went through my own process where I had to also come into a relationship with my yoni, and the more I’ve come into my relationship with my yoni, the more it’s opened to also come into relation with him. I learned that I needed to tend to myself as well because at the beginning, it was a “Well, you just do it” thing. I was just not taking responsibility for myself. And as I’ve taken more responsibility, listened more to my yoni, and taken her seriously, it’s also opened up the space.
Because you were also there as a witness for me to release all that physical tension. I mean, all those blocks, again, like we’re saying, are a physical tension. So for him to release the physical tension slowly and also feel her energy more and more—yeah.
KIM: When you say release the physical tension, do you mean through yoni massage or what?
CARLA: Yeah, through yoni massage in particular.
PRACARSH: Yeah. I think lately we’ve also been doing some fascial work on the yoni because everything is connected and—
CARLA: That’s also been very helpful.
PRACARSH: So learning some fascial meridians and what we can do where, massaging around the yoni, doing fascial maneuvers around the yoni; that has also really helped in general to literally bring hydration to the yoni.
CARLA: Yeah, that’s also been very helpful.
PRACARSH: Because something dehydrated her. That’s why they’re not flowing. That’s why the juices are not coming. So I think that has actually been quite helpful.
CARLA: Yeah.
KIM: Anything else you want to add to the relationships you have with each other’s genitals?
CARLA: I think the craziest thing for me has been realizing that our body is so energetically sentient. Our mind is just a tiny fraction of what our body is capable of experiencing and feeling. The intelligence that exists within our genitals and within our sexual organs is crazy. People say a lot of bad things about the genitals and stuff. There are all these slurs.
Genital curses
KIM: Every curse word is genitalia related. “Oh fuck,” or “You’re a cunt,” or “You’re a pussy,” “You’re a dickhead,” “You’re a cock,” “You’re a cocksucker.” Everything is some blasphemy toward the genitals.
CARLA: And it’s so sad.
KIM: Asshole! [Laughs]
CARLA: Asshole, yeah.
KIM: Or you’re the worst thing ever. “You’re a dick!” It seems like it’s the worst thing.
CARLA: It’s not true at all. He has the purest, gentlest, most beautiful energy. I’m constantly just thinking, “Wow.”
The purity and beauty of his cock as a higher being
The devotion comes so naturally because I’m just realizing, “I’m in the presence of a higher being.” My mind cannot comprehend or even come close to the purity that this holds.
And my yoni is the same. Both of them. Even my breasts, the amount of energy. And his balls also. His balls are a completely different entity from his dick. They’re connected, but they have two different energies. When they’re open and flowing, they have so much to give and so much to show us about ourselves, about life, about everything.
It’s very true which may sound crazy to some people, but I really feel that when I’m in communion, I’m in the presence of something much bigger than me.
KIM: I love that. It makes me think that that has to be true because otherwise, why would there be this very deliberate distortion of those energies? Like I said, someone came up with this idea of putting all these blaspheming, cursing, condemning words attached to all the genitalia. Why would someone do that if it wasn’t a gaslighting-type psyop to help distract you from the actual truth that lies underneath that?
CARLA: Yeah. Because when we hear all of that, we grow up thinking, “Oh, ew, genitalia is so gross; I’ve got to stay away,” and then so much shame and so much taboo. But it’s so silly because there is so much energy there, and it’s so beautiful. And it’s an energy that holds you to your highest standard.
Genitals demand coherence and honesty. Otherwise they shut down
KIM: How do you mean that it holds you to the highest standard?
CARLA: Like what we were saying, if we’re way out of alignment with truth or intention when we approach, it tells us, “No. No. I will not accept this. I’m not accepting this. I know you’re capable of so much more than this. No.”
I think one way to describe it is when I’m in communion with that energy, it almost brings more coherence. It becomes like a feedback loop because he’s giving me that high energy. So then all the things that are low-energy in me, or that are like negativity or blocked, have to come up to be released because my body can’t hold those two things at the same time. It’s like a contradiction.
Within the relationship of our field, within the field of our body, energetically, internally, as the energy heightens in our genitalia, in our bodies, everything that does not match that frequency has to go. It has to be cleared.
I think the way to summarize it is that as we come into communion more and more with this high-frequency energy our bodies are capable of creating and holding, the more we have to level up and grow. Then that gets translated out into our everyday life and our perspective.
It’s funny because that then creates more block clearing because that stuff just cannot be held.
PRACARSH: Yeah. There are many stones in the river that are not moving. So when you go upstream and you move some of those rocks, the flowing freezes. But increasing the flow helps move some bigger rocks that are there. Those bigger rocks move, and the flow increases even more. Then you can even move very big rocks.
Once you start clearing blocks and more show up, it just shows that the flow of your life has increased, and it wants to get cleared of all the shit that is in the way.
It can be like, oh man, will this ever end? Is my whole life going to be just block clearing, block clearing, block clearing? But feel how the intensity of the flow has changed. So it feels like we’re moving really big things now. All the small things are out of the way. We’re moving the big stones in the river now.
CARLA: And the more we do that, the easier our life has become.
PRACARSH: Yeah. There’s less obstruction. And she was saying, “If you go to a river and there’s a big rock, usually what you’ll see is water looping around behind the rock, like stagnant water.” So having these rocks in the river stagnates your flow a little bit.
CARLA: It keeps you looping.
PRACARSH: It keeps you looping. So once you remove that, it’s like [holding both fists together and then swinging them open].
KIM: Yeah. I love that. I was thinking when you were describing the impeccability that the genitals demand, it’s like going to a temple. People talk about how you have to purify and cleanse yourself to even enter the temple, and you enter the temple to gain a more direct connection with God, spirit, and yourself, but you have to come to the temple cleansed and purified as much as you can before you’re allowed to go in.
CARLA: Yeah, I agree. Exactly.
PRACARSH: Yeah, yeah.
KIM: Yeah. Anything else on that topic? The whole genital communication?
PRACARSH: I think the thing that we realized is that this is all natural. How you eat and drink and walk and wake up and sleep. These are natural.
Genitals communicate. They are high-energy beings.
Sex is not you. Sex should happen. If it’s not happening, address the blocks that are in the way. The problem is not always on a sexual level, it’s—
CARLA: It’s maybe more upstream. But this energy is something natural. We should all be able to feel it.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
CARLA: We’ve always been able to perceive energy and move energy and all those things. But even so, I feel like it’s just a natural part of the body. I have no evidence for this. This is just so much what I feel because as we’ve been removing blocks, this has just been what’s happened, so it can’t be anything else. It’s the only thing that makes sense.
Consciously using pro-creative sexual energy to manifest in life
KIM: Yeah. I think that underneath, within my work, talking about the genitals being these barometers and these truth centers and channels, conduits of energy, that is the truth that’s underneath it all. And people start to uncover that, and that’s why I say all this energy gets liberated in them and in their lives when they do this. But there’s such a massive effort to obscure that truth and to cover it over with shame and taboo and misinformation. Yeah.
You mentioned all this truth-speaking and alignment pours out into your day-to-day life. As your own truth comes online, how does that manifest in your outer life? What changes do you see happening?
PRACARSH: I think I’ve lost all resistance. I don’t feel resistance now. I’m not resisting anything. I have discernment, but the resistance that I was feeling toward life, toward inviting stuff in, has gone.
When that happens first, I think it assimilates into the beauty of your life right now. I was holding myself in resistance with my family to some extent. Once those things dropped because the flow increased, I realized how beautiful life is in this moment and how many opportunities there are.
I’m feeling that my soul quality is becoming clearer to me. What am I here for? That was very hard for me to articulate. Even at the end of the salon, continuing to clear blocks in all those things has at least brought me to a point where I can say, okay, this is what I want.
And I think when you’re able to speak that, it just finds resonance. I don’t know how it finds resonance, but it does. So what you truly want is genuinely reflected in life because we’re also in this sexual process with life. It’s not just with each other; it’s like a metaphor for all of life. As I hold more space, I also start receiving from life.
CARLA: It changed our entire career focus. Three weeks into the salon, I had a very shitty NGO job that I had been fighting with and hating for so long. Then things just magically happened to the point where I had to leave that job. It wasn’t anything that I created; it all just happened by providence. It all just came, and then I was able to recuperate a good amount of money from the last of it.
Then it was over, and since then it’s been like, okay, everything that’s out of alignment with your soul and your true energy has got to go now. That was the first phase. And that was amazing.
Then everything that he’s saying, everything that is now in alignment with our soul, just very easily, without a lot of effort, shows up in the field. And then you start to realize, “Okay, this is coming into my field. It’s also probably for a reason. Okay, why is this coming in?”
And you start to cocreate with life in that way of understanding that it’s all a microcosm. I’m in a relationship with myself and my energy. I’m in a relationship with him and his energy. We’re in a relationship together; we’re in a relationship with life.
And as things come into the field, we’re not being in resistance, not hiding, not protecting, not tensing.
PRACARSH: Not tensing, like you would tense your sex organs.
CARLA: Yeah, or not tensing when we’re having a conversation. “Okay, what do you have for me? What’s here? Okay. Let’s look.” That has increased, and all these crazy things since then; we’ve completely shifted focus in terms of our career with no resistance and no effort, and things are just coming.
PRACARSH: Things are just coming.
CARLA: Things are just coming. For example, I quit that shitty NGO job. Now we’re managing an aspect of his family business. The amount of money that I was making at that NGO job, we’re now making more money through managing that aspect of the family business. We didn’t have to do anything for that.
PRACARSH: Working half an hour.
CARLA: Working half an hour a day. I was working seven hours a day, slaving away to make the same amount of money, and now it just happens. Like, “Hey, do you want this?” “Um, yeah. Cool.” But before, maybe when that would’ve happened, we would’ve said, “Oh, do we want to … ” There may have been some more resistance to it for whatever reason.
Now we can just see it very clearly for the opportunity that it is, and we also make the choice that, “Okay, I’m not going to be resistant to this; I’m going to take this. Thank you, life. I know you have the best interest in mind for me.”
KIM: I love this parallel that as we liberate the procreative energy of the genitals as these channels of life force, then we become pure conduits for that. It moves out into the world, and it begins to create. You talk about the cocreation. Then we are consciously and even unconsciously bringing these things into our field. The field is reflecting these inner changes and that inner alignment and that purity, and we get things that show up in our space that are much more reflections of that, rather than huge gaps of disharmony; they’re very, very aligned. And even the ease, like you’re saying, now it’s like half an hour a day of something that’s easy and blissful versus seven hours of slogging it out.
CARLA: Yeah. Life has definitely felt more easy. And I think it’s also that we feel more at ease in ourselves, so life feels easier.
PRACARSH: Yeah. I think it’s because of that only, because we feel easy in ourselves, we are clear about who we are, we are not holding resistance in us, we are choosing to grow, we are choosing to face the challenges with a growth mindset, and so life just feels very easy.
Even in the challenges that have come our way, there is much more capacity now in us to handle those challenges clearly than there was earlier, just because we were constricted in all the different ways.
KIM: I wanted to touch on something else that you’d mentioned, Carla. We spoke earlier about the genitals changing shape as a result of these blockages being cleared. You mentioned that you’d had your yoni change in texture and shape and become fuller and more alive. How would you describe those shifts? And anything else you want to say about that?
CARLA: Yeah, I think before the salon, she was dry. She would get wet and everything, but it wasn’t a state of being. It would just maybe happen, maybe not happen. I had no consciousness or awareness of what was going on with her. There was just a disconnect.
Texturally, she felt dry, almost receded or something; the walls felt very brittle, almost, and very sensitive.
PRACARSH: And when I would massage, it would feel hard and almost like this [holding up hand and squeezing tense fingers].
Regular yoni massage and jade egg to unwind a “hard” and closed vagina
CARLA: Yeah, very tense. As with regular yoni massage with the jade egg and also listening to her more, that has softened so much. She feels much fuller. A very crazy shift is that before I had to make an effort to move energy from her. I had to very consciously breathe or tune into the energy. There was a lot of effort involved.
And as she’s softened, and I can literally feel her be more hydrated, there’s more flow down there, like the energy just moves. I don’t have to think about it. I just have to be almost a bit in a thoughtless state, and that’s actually been really important to learn how to focus in a thoughtless way, but not in an effortful way. There’s a very big difference. One is forcing, and the other is like, okay, I’m just going to be present, and the energy just moves. It’s like vibrations of energy come from her all the way up my body, and I get transported into different dimensions, in between reality, like I’m gone. I am feeling energy moving through my body like crazy. Colors. I lose the edges of my body completely, and I know that’s her energy moving through.
It’s been a parallel feeling, amplified energy in my body, and feeling her physically shift and become more open and more supple. Yeah.
KIM: Is that just during sex or anytime, any place?
CARLA: It’s more outside of sex. When we’re having sex, it’s a little bit easier because there are both of us witnessing. There are two energies coming together to witness that and move it. That has become an easier place to do that, and in everyday life, it’s still more like, “Okay, let me tune in, let me feel her, what is she saying?” slowly building that relationship. Because for me, building the relationship with my yoni has been a process of falling in love with my life, which was not the case at all a year ago. I was not in love with my life at all.
So I’m still moving through all the realizations that I need to, to truly be able to say, “Oh my god, I love my body, I love myself,” and really mean it. And I love my life. I’m just so excited and happy to be here. I am on that journey right now, and it’s been really beautiful; it’s been a healing journey of finding tools and mechanisms and things to also complement that.
So yeah, outside of life, I feel like she’s always present now. Like she’s reflecting back to me, “Okay, you need to see this now.” “Okay, we’ve moved from this; now you’ve got to see …” “Okay, now you’ve got to bring this in …” And that’s been my journey with myself. I think your salon initiated a really beautiful and intense journey of learning how to surrender and take what life gives me and not be in protection.
Before this, before our marriage, I came from a lineage of strong, independent women who so desperately wanted to be taken care of by a man. But it was like the worst of both worlds. To undo all of that in me, all of that tension that I was holding, has been my process since the salon. During the salon and after the salon.
KIM: Love it. Is there anything else that you guys would like to share?
Sex and meditation amplify each other
PRACARSH: I think I want to share that meditation has really been helpful. We are initiated into a lineage of meditation through my mother. Here, it’s an 800-year old lineage of Himalayan meditation, and you keep your intention inside you and let the energies come.
So we are realizing, and this helps us in reflecting on your work, because sometimes when we face a block in your work, and we feel like, “Shit, what to do? What to do?” we see sex is a medium to flow energy. Meditation is also a medium in which energy flows. So having a couple of these mediums is very nice because one medium can point to what you might also need in the other.
When we actually just lose ourselves, energies start flowing. So to observe all those things in us has also helped us a lot in realizing, okay, maybe this is the thing that we’re missing when approaching each other sexually.
CARLA: Yeah. Because when we would initiate or be in a sex date or something, all of a sudden, a lot of thoughts would come. Those thoughts would take you out of the present moment, and they were almost like dissociations.
So we would do techniques to come back to each other, very simple things, but it would still happen. As we grew in our meditation practice to keep our attention—it’s a soft focus, but it’s just a presence—it helped us see all the places where we were dissociating from each other and, therefore, from life, and vice versa. Two energy modalities.
The way I see it is that meditation works up here [patting her head] and sex works down here [pointing to groin], and they’re both meeting each other, and it’s both like the energy is melding.
Anyway, it’s been helpful for us to have different healing and energy modalities to triangulate where we’re at whenever we hit a block, like he’s saying.
PRACARSH: Yeah. And then, I think the way we find the difference is that, now that we’re intimate with each other, we feel the energy flowing almost naturally. I remember that earlier, I would visualize energy rising from the base of my spine, moving up to my head, and spreading down. I had to almost visualize it to circulate it.
CARLA: Which I think was the first step.
PRACARSH: Which was the first step, definitely. But now it’s just rising. I am not even visualizing per se; it’s just rising. It just happens.
CARLA: Once you activate those energy channels, it just happens. And then it keeps growing, which is what’s crazy. You keep going, and it keeps expanding. And like you say, there’s always another level to go, and there’s also another level to go with that energy expansion. It just keeps going. So that’s really exciting and fun.
KIM: I love it. Anything else that you’d like to add to the whole conversation?
CARLA: I just want to say that being in a conscious monogamous relationship where the container is sealed between you has seriously been one of the most healing and beautiful experiences of my life. I am so grateful for it every day. I’m really grateful for your work. That has given us the tools to always make sure that our relationship is good.
We never fight. Tension doesn’t exist for more than maybe an hour.
Everything is flowing so much between us; the nice thing is, we have the very conscious tools to create this. It’s not just happening. It’s not random.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
CARLA: We’re responsible. We hold a very conscious, radical responsibility for ourselves and our relationship, and we know that, okay, this is going to keep growing and evolving. This isn’t going to just randomly degrade in some weird, unknown way where we say, “Oh my god, I don’t even know what happened.” No. Everything has been brought to the table. Everything is conscious. Everything is there. Nothing is behind any closed door.
That gives us a lot of confidence to move through life together, and that’s been incredibly healing on every level.
PRACARSH: Yeah.
KIM: Beautiful. I’m so glad to hear it. Thank you so much for sharing all of this and giving us these beautiful insights into the language of genital-speak.
[Laughter]
CARLA: You’re the best.
PRACARSH: You really are.
